


Walk

by NaturallyBroken



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-30
Updated: 2012-11-01
Packaged: 2017-11-17 09:08:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 39,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/549931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaturallyBroken/pseuds/NaturallyBroken
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bruce is content with living and working in Stark Tower and his growing friendship with Tony and Pepper. But things begin to change, the other guy becomes harder to keep in, and Bruce feels he has no other choice but to leave until he can figure out what's gone wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Appropriate

Everything was complete; once again his life was compacted into a moderately sized backpack. He left the password for all his research on a note for Tony. He attached it to Dummy so that he would actually find it.

Bruce took one more walk around the living area, unconsciously touching as many surfaces as possible, as if each touch would store up the calm he felt here. It seems odd that any place that occupied someone as kinetic as Tony could invoke a sense of anything resembling calm. But, until recently, it had done that for Bruce. There was barely a stir from the beast within. He hadn't gone away, he'd never go away; he just hadn't seemed much up for appearances.

He steps over the place where the  _Other Guy_  left a Loki-sized hole once. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Even though it had been repaired, it still was a reminder how one wrong moment could destroy this calm. He didn't want to do that to his fellow Avenger, his business partner, to his… friend.

He entered the public elevator and hit the button for the ground floor. He couldn't remember ever using the public elevator since he seemed to always enter and leave the building with Tony and they used Starks' private garage.

The private elevator only had music if Tony requested Jarvis to play something. This public elevator seemed to have music piped in. The orchestral playing intrigued him; he had only heard the opening few moments but it seemed to reflect how his heart felt right then, calm, sad, and slightly discordant.

"Jarvis?" Bruce had become used to talking to the computer as much as Tony had. But he wondered if its range extended to the public areas.

"Yes, Dr. Banner."

"What is this song?"

"Bittersweet Symphony."

"Hmm, how appropriate," Bruce closed his eyes and listened to the song.

A few floors down Bruce's eyes flew open. "Fuck," he realized he didn't leave a message telling Tony and Pepper he was leaving. "Uh, Jarvis?"

"Yes, Dr. Banner."

"Could you leave Mr. Stark a message that I've left…"

"Would you like to record a personal message or should I just place the information in his notes?"

Bruce thought how that would be notated. 12:30pm Dr. Banner left the building. That would be wrong, especially after all Tony has done for him. "I'll record a message, thank you."

"Just begin speaking and I will record, Dr. Banner, say 'full stop' when you are done." Jarvis muted the music; Bruce took a deep breath, and began. What came out were short bursts, snatches of thoughts. Science he could describe at great length; emotions, well they hadn't been the best of friends lately.

"Tony … Pepper."

"Thank you."

"You've made me feel so welcome, so at home… like I'm home."

"I'm sorry."

"Can't keep putting people… I… care about… in danger."

"It's not if the monster will come out, it's when."

"Don't want to risk… hurt… you."

"I'm sorry."

Bruce takes another deep breath, "Full stop Jarvis."

"Message has been forwarded to Mr. Stark." Jarvis returns the music to the normal levels as the singer is repeating the words "I can change" again and again.

Bruce sighs, "How appropriate."

The elevator dings, ground floor, Bruce steps out into the lobby. One hundred steps from the elevator to the door and to a solitary life again.


	2. Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Listen to me Tony. Bruce… is… gone."

Tony was practically skipping. Stark? Skipping? Perish the thought, but he did have energy to spare as pulled the car into his garage and now was heading toward the elevator which would take him to his private quarters in Stark Tower. He had just convinced one of the top biomedical labs in the country to sign on to work on the "Hulk problem". It probably had something to do with the copious amounts of cash he promised to throw their way but they had made great strides in heavy mood tranquilizers that didn't leave the person a drooling lump. It would be nice being able to give Bruce access to more scientists that had his best interest at heart. Tony would make damn sure of that best interest; he was certainly going to be paying them enough. He didn't want the big guy to go completely away, he was essential to the Avengers. But maybe if they could calm the rage down, Bruce could control, maybe even work with, his alter ego instead of just being taken along for the ride.

"And," Tony mused, "Maybe we can remove that giant stick out of his ass and he can cut loose." While Tony loved having someone around that could keep up with him scientifically, he thought the guy really needed to loosen up and have some fun. He understood why he couldn't, didn't mean he liked it.

Ascending to the living area, he thought this victory required a celebration. "Jarvis?"

"Yes, Mr. Stark."

"Is Ms. Potts in the building?"

"Yes."

"Patch me through…Pepper?"

"Great Tony, you're back. Br..."

"Yes Pepper, I have returned victorious. It's time to break out the champagne. Oh and can you pull Bruce out of Lab Three and tell him I have good news?"

"I can't do that Tony, and I don't think you are going to want champagne."

"Of course you can, he likes you and he's too polite to refuse a woman, and when have I never liked champagne, okay I totally can't stand that pink crap they serve at tacky political functions, I mean does that even qualify as champagne I swear it's some kind of vintage bath tub gin, anyway I don't even stock that crap. So just…”

"He's gone, Tony."

"Er, who's gone Pepper? And why are we changing the subject, I think I was distinctly talking about celebration and nothing gets in the way of a good…"

"Listen to me Tony. Bruce… is… gone. He apparently packed and left after lunch. If you bother to listen to messages you would know this. I have been calling you repeatedly."

Tony was decidedly not in a celebration mood once he exited the elevator. He looked across the room at Pepper "I was in meetings, I couldn't take calls." Then it hits him " He's gone?"

"He left you a message... Jarvis?"

"Yes, Ms. Potts"

"Play Dr. Banner's message for Tony."

Tony was quiet and listened but he paced back and forth during the entire message. He wanted to "do something" to "fix something" to fix Bruce. Like in the lab whenever he felt Bruce was getting down on himself, he was always there to throw in a joke or a game or something to distract Bruce, to make him feel better for a while. But now all he could do was listen to the hurt, and hurt along with him.

Tony stopped pacing, "Jarvis, is there any other audio of Dr. Banner from today, before or after he left the message." He turns to Pepper, "Maybe he called a cab or someone to pick him up or…"

Pepper sighed, "Tony I already listened to …"

"There is additional audio of Dr. Banner."

Tony shushes Pepper, "Jarvis play additional audio." There is not much to hear, just Banner talking about something being appropriate and him remembering to leave a message for Tony.

"Jarvis was he talking to anyone else."

"To me, Mr. Stark"

"Add in your audio and replay." Tony begins to hum the tune the moment he hears it in the background of Jarvis and Bruce's brief conversation. "Yes Bruce, how very appropriate." Tony was more than familiar with the song. It usually made an appearance in the rotation when he was getting good and maudlin drunk. It didn't happen as much anymore but this seemed like a good time for a reunion. Tony started to head for the wet bar when Pepper met him halfway, pushing a drink into his hand.

"One drink and one playing of the song, then go do something useful," Pepper says as she gives him a quick kiss on the cheek and starts walking out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"Out of range, I can't stand that song and I can't stand what it does to you. I'm not leaving the building, call when you are ready to be Tony again."

Tony moved out onto the terrace, with his drink in hand and collapsed into one of the chairs.

"Jarvis play Bittersweet Symphony, one time through, no interruptions." He started and finished the drink in one long sip, feeling the warmth spread down his throat and across his chest. Then he sat back, closed his eyes and let the dark settle in.


	3. Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Pepper I'm ready to start operation Find Bruce now."

Tony had his dark time of the soul out on the terrace. Time to reflect on how far he had come and yet how far he hadn't. Plenty of time to reflect on how much he cared about Bruce. He wouldn't say love, not because he didn't believe in the concept, but that it always complicated things, made everything so vulnerable, so fragile. But what he felt for Bruce, and also Pepper, was as close as he would ever get to love. These two people were the only ones in the world, out of over six billion, that he believed would still put up with him if he wasn't a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and superhero. To them, he wasn't Iron Man or Mr. Stark; he was simply Tony and all that came with that, good and bad. Two people out of six billion and now one of them was gone.

Tony opened his eyes when he realized how quiet it was. Well as quiet as it can be on an open terrace high above a sprawling metropolis. The song was over, the drink long finished, and as Pepper had said, it was now time to do something useful. While dialing Ms. Potts, Stark walked back into the living room. He had an idea, several actually, of how to find Banner. How he was going to get him to come back? Well that would have to wait until he found him. He would think of something, after all he was a billionaire, playboy, superhero, AND genius right?

"Tony?"

"Yes, Pepper I'm ready to start operation Find Bruce now. We will need maps, several in fact and…"

"Tony..."

"We need to overlay different routes that he could utilize to leave the city; bus, rail, subway..."

"Tony!"

"Actually scratch bus and subway, he'd go nuts on them, all those people and eventually some ass would harass him, he does have victim written all over him at times. I'm sure he knows that already so he definitely wouldn't take the bus or subway. Hmm, scratch passenger rail as well, less assholes, but still too many people, maybe freight trains though, he could hop into one of the open cars and…

"Mr. Stark!" That got his attention. "First, if you look up, you'll see we are in the same room." Tony looked up to see Pepper wearing that patient smile she had when she was suppressing the urge to smack some sense into him. She made a show of sliding her finger across her phone screen, ending the call. Tony mouths an 'oops' then does the same.

"Second," Pepper continued, "We've found him…"

"What? When? How, how is he?"

Pepper held up one finger "When was about 30 minutes ago and before you ask I didn't tell you immediately because I wanted your pity party to be good and done with first. It is done, right?"

Tony waves the comment off dismissively "Of course it is, but…"

Pepper cuts him off again, raising a second finger, "The how, well you have Happy and his friends to thank for that."

"Happy has friends?"

Pepper let out an exasperated sigh, "Everyone has friends Tony."

He could immediately think of at least two people who probably didn't but for once he decided not to debate Pepper, he was more concerned about Bruce. Pepper had a third finger up but he had completely missed the beginning of what she said.

"… told Happy not to approach, just report back when they found him."

"How is he?" Tony started pacing, he wanted a drink but knew now was not a good time. A million thoughts were running through his head. What if Bruce had been hit by a truck and is unconscious and Happy is just sitting there waiting for orders? What if someone had done something to him and caused the  _Other Guy_  to come out? Then S.H.I.E.L.D. would become involved and they want to take him in and they wouldn't let him come back to the tower. What if… Tony was stopped in his tracks by something solid. He focused enough to realize it was Pepper. She grabbed his shoulders. He noticed the very concerned, almost pained look on her face, oh god how is Br…

"Tony, I really need you to focus for me. You know I hate repeating myself."

Tony took deep breath, trying to calm down the screaming of thoughts in his head to at least a dull hum. "How is he?"

"He's fine Tony. He's hitchhiking. But, since there just happens to be a lot of police cars very visibly patrolling that particular stretch of road, he's not getting any takers. But I'm sure someone driving bright red Lamborghini convertible wouldn't care about the cops and offer him a ride."

It takes a few seconds but Tony finally clues in on what Pepper is saying.

"I'm leaving right now," Tony races toward the elevator, stopping a few steps from the door. He turns and walks back to Pepper, caressing either side of her face with his hands. "Have I ever told you how brilliant you are?"

"I think about 12% of the time."

"You are never going to let that go are you? Pepper, I…" He can't bring himself to say it. "Pepper, I... thank you, thank you for finding Bruce, and thank you for putting up with me."

Pepper then reaches up and touches Tony hands then slowly pulls them away from her face. "Go Tony, bring him home."

Tony is turning the key in the ignition before he remembers he forgot to ask where he was driving to. The onboard navigation system engages when he turns the key.

"Travel itinerary set, estimated time to arrival at destination 25 minutes." Of course she had already programed the coordinates into his GPS.

"I couldn't live without you Pepper Potts." He put the car in gear and headed to get Bruce. The GPS thought it would take 25 minutes, Stark made it in 15.


	4. Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm being unreasonable? Wanting to protect people who have been way nicer to me than I ever deserved is being unreasonable? Do you think I look forward to the other guy destroying their lives? He will you know, it's not theory Tony, it's time and time again of me letting my guard down and everything going apeshit. I have no choice but to live with the monster inside, please let me chose not to inflict him on others."

Tony was clearly driving over the speed limit. In a Lamborghini convertible it was hard not to. Add to that his worry about whether he could get Bruce to come back and it was amazing he wasn't hitting triple digit speeds. About five miles before Tony reached Bruce he started to notice all the police cars. As he would pull up alongside them to pass, the officer would give Tony a quick wave, make a u-turn in the median, and head in the opposite direction.

"Hap has a lot of friends; I wonder what the hell he promised them for doing this." Tony mused that he would probably be writing a pretty big check in the future. It didn't matter though, it was only money; he'd just make more.

He could see Bruce now, walking along the side of the road. He didn't seem to even acknowledge the cars passing by, like he had given up on catching a ride while the police were out in force. Tony breathed a sigh of relief, Pepper had said he was okay but seeing him made it believable. Tony pulled the ultra-expensive car off the road onto the gravel shoulder about 20 feet ahead of Bruce, kicking up enough dust and rocks to get his attention but Tony blew the horn just to make sure.

Through the rear view mirror Tony could see Bruce walking toward the car. He tilted his head down hoping that Bruce would be so happy to get a ride that he wouldn't pay much attention to the car or the person in it. Luckily the vanity plate on this one just said Tony. There could be a lot of rich guys name Tony right?

Bruce opened the door, "Thanks for pulling over; I thought with all the police patrols I would have to walk all day."

"You're welcome." Bruce jumped back and quickly closed the door.

"I should've known it would be you Tony. I'm not going back."

"Back to hitchhiking to some remote area of the world, of course you're not. You are getting in the car, and coming back to the city where you belong."

"Tony, I told you I wasn't going back. I can't. I'm too dangerous to be around you and..."

"Bruce I'm too dangerous to be around me and I'm still here right?"

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Neither does a brilliant scientist hitchhiking on the side of the road when he has a perfectly good place to stay, but here we are."

"Tony, I'm really grateful you let me stay at Stark Tower and spend time working in the labs. I had missed that out on the road. But understand I need to go away now."

"I don't understand, now get in the car, I'm hungry and I need a drink."

Bruce sighed. "Why can someone so smart not understand why I need leave?"

"Maybe because you're being a dumbass." Tony regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. It must have been a record on how fast he went from witty banter to childish retort. But he didn't want to banter, not now; he wanted Bruce in the damn car. He wanted his new normal back. If Bruce had told him he was going on a trip and was coming back maybe it would be different. But this running away, it was hitting all of his abandonment issues big time. "I didn't mean to call you a dumbass Bruce, but you have to admit you are being unreasonable."

"I'm being unreasonable? Wanting to protect people who have been way nicer to me than I ever deserved is being unreasonable? Do you think I look forward to the other guy destroying their lives? He will you know, it's not theory Tony, it's time and time again of me letting my guard down and everything going apeshit. I have no choice but to live with the monster inside, please let me chose not to inflict him on others."

"First, Bruce you always deserve people to be nice to you. Hell people should be a lot nicer to you than they are now. You DID help save the world, by the way, and me too, don't forget. Secondly, we can work on Mr. Green and Ragey. That was the news I was coming home with before someone decided to go walkabout. You know that biomed meeting I had this morning? We came to an agreement and starting Monday you will have 20 assistants to work with you on calming the other guy down." Tony flashed Bruce one of his winning smiles. He loved springing surprises. Unfortunately, Tony was in for a surprise of his own.

"Work with me or on me?" Bruce said with a barely concealed growl. "Dammit Tony, I thought you considered me a friend, not just another one of your experiments. If I wanted to be poke, prodded and shot up, shit, I would have given Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D. the first option."

Tony felt dull pain in his chest that had nothing to do with the arc reactor. "But Bruce I …"

"You what, Tony, only did what you thought was in my best interests?" Tony mutely nodded. "How do you know what my best interests are, what do you even know about me?" Tony goes to answer and Bruce cuts him off with a snarl. "I'm going to walk away now… Don't follow me." Bruce stomps off further down the shoulder of the road.

Tony beats the steering wheel with his hands; he wants to run after Bruce, to help in some way. But he knows right now all he will do is push Bruce over the edge, if he hasn't already and let the other guy out.

"What does he mean I don't know him? He loves science, hates the other guy, and oh yeah, he's always angry. Well he's made that fucking apparent now." Tony spent a while drumming on the steering wheel trying to figure out what about the good news set Bruce off. He considered calling Pepper for her opinion but figured the call would involve her sighing a lot and him feeling more like the dumbass he accused Bruce of being. Finally he decided, screw it, he would just ask him. Tony turned the ignition, shifted into gear and headed back on the road to find Bruce again.

It took Tony very little time to find Bruce. He hadn't "hulked out" as evident by the fact he was still dressed, so he only was covering the distance at human speed. As Tony passed by he could tell Bruce, although visibly calmer than when he last saw him, was still pretty tense. It would be best to pull off somewhere ahead and walk back to him, it would be less confrontational and maybe he wouldn't go off the deep end. Plus the walk would give Tony time to figure out how not to put his foot in his mouth again.

"Go back to your car Tony." Tony had made it within 50 feet of Bruce before he noticed him. "I'm barely holding the big guy in."

"I just want to apologize."

"For what?" Bruce snapped.

"For assuming that I knew what you needed. Bruce, you are the closest thing to a friend I got besides Pepper and I wanted to do something nice for you. I fucked that up apparently, even though I'm still not sure how. But in my defense how the hell do you expect anyone to know what you really want when you run off just as they are getting to know you?

Two things effected Bruce greatly, anger and guilt. Anger was the other guy's territory, guilt, amazingly gave Bruce the strength to put the rage genie back into bottle for a while, if for no other reason than to avoid more guilt if he got out.

"I'm such an ass, Tony. The big guy has been rattling his cage for the last two weeks. He wants out and I've done everything I know how to keep him in. But as you can see he's seeping out all over the place and," Bruce sighs, "I'm so tired of fighting him."

"You should've said something Bruce," Tony moves toward Bruce, to comfort him. Bruce puts his hands out in front to keep him away, but Tony still wants to help. "Why don't we go back to the car …" Bruce glares at him. "Just to talk Bruce, no tricks I promise. Here," Tony reaches in his pocket for his keys and holds them out "you can even hold the keys."

"Aren't you worried I could "hulk out" and destroy your really, really expensive car?" Bruce says with a slight smirk on his face.

"It's a car Bruce, not a person, it can be replaced."

As they walked back to the car, every few steps Tony would glance over at Bruce. He still didn't trust that Bruce wouldn't just turn and go in the other direction.

"I've got the big guy under control right now Tony, you don't have to worry."

"I'm not worried. The big guy likes me."

"And you came to that conclusion how?"

"He did save my life."

"Yeah, I'm still trying to figure that out."

"Maybe you have more control than you think?"

"It's not enough Tony, not nearly enough."

They arrive back at the car, get in, and just sit quietly. Cars pass by, the occasional truck pelts them with a fine mist of dirt but still they continue to say nothing.

"What's wrong Tony?"

"Why would you think something's wrong?"

"We've been sitting here at least 10 minutes, and you haven't said a word. The only time you go this long without saying something is when you are unconscious."

Tony hrmphs. "I thought I was being considerate. Obviously something is bothering you so I thought I'd let you tell me."

"You know what's bothering me. The other guy wants out."

"Nothing more? Really? Because I thought he always wanted out, so why would that make you pack up and leave?"

Bruce really couldn't answer that, all he knew was that there was some new anxiety in him that was making it hard to keep the big guy under control. He was pretty sure it had something to do with Tony and Stark Tower but couldn't figure out exactly what, the big guy was making it hard to think anymore. Running away wasn't the most mature way of dealing with it but it was what he knew and right now he really didn't want to talk about it. "So why do you want me to come back?"

"Oh, not going to answer my question? Okay I'll let it go right now. I want you to come back because having you around has created some kind of normalcy in my life; one that I like and don't want to go away anytime soon."

"Wow Tony, if I'm normalcy, then your life is more fucked up that I realized."

"Or maybe you are not as fucked up as you think. Putting, big, green, and destructive aside you're a really great person. You are smart, you are caring, did I mention you were smart, and you may not think I noticed but you have a wicked sense of humor. I've heard those whispered wise cracks during Fury's long-assed briefings. Your comments are much funnier than Barton's."

Bruce had to smile at that. It had been a long time since someone said he was good at something that didn't involve his research.

Tony looks over in time to catch the smile just before it fades. "See that's another thing. You have such a great smile that no one ever really gets to see. It lights up your whole face."

Bruce chuckles quietly, "Mr. Stark, are you trying to seduce me?"

"Of course, I mean of course not. You know," Tony takes his time really looking at Bruce taking in all the parts that makes up that man with the beast inside. When he reaches Bruce's eyes it becomes all too intense and he looks away, "I've never really thought about it. I don't mean just you, I mean any guy. I just go where the gonads tell me to and that's been to women but maybe that's because that was what was available… I have seen you naked and I wasn't repulsed, I even found parts appealing... I don't even know what that even means and how that could even work… and what if it ends up being bad, does that mean you leave again, heck I don't know if you are even staying now …

Bruce places a gentle hand on one of Tony's wrists that is attached to a hand currently white knuckling the steering wheel. "Let it go, Tony, you are going to give yourself an aneurism." Tony continues on for a few more sentences before it registers what Bruce had said. He takes a deep breath, than another trying to calm him down. Had he really just wound himself up that much just thinking about the possibility that he wanted more from Bruce than a business partnership and friendship?

"Do you want me to seduce you?"

"Let it go, Tony," Bruce repeats because he's not sure what he feels either. Tony is quiet but he's still white knuckling the steering wheel. "Here," taps the keys against Tony's knuckles, "it's getting dark; maybe we should get off the side of the road." Tony is startled out of his thoughts and takes the keys and starts the ignition.

"Where are we going?"

"I don't know Tony, could we just drive for a while."

"We could do that," Tony shifts into gear and eases back onto the road and drives on into the ever darkening night.

"Crap. I probably should've called Pepper by now. Sometimes I swear I need another Pepper to remind me of the stuff I need to do for Pepper." Tony has the onboard system make the call.

"Hi Tony, is everything okay?" Tony looks over to Bruce, glancing away when he returns the look.

"He's in the car."

"Great, when are you all making it back to the tower?"

"Uhm, we are taking a drive and…"

"I haven't decided if I'm coming back," Bruce interjected. "I know what Tony wants, but the big guy is getting hostile and I want you and Tony to be safe."

"Believe me, being around Tony you get used to not being safe. I know the decision is yours but my vote would be for you to come back. Tony needs someone to talk science with and I need someone vaguely sane around here. You are a really sweet guy Bruce, you don't need to be out there all alone."

"I'll think about it Pepper, that's all I can promise right now."

"I understand Bruce. Tony, you be nice to him."

"I'm trying Pepper."

"Then do better, I want him back here." They continued talking for a few more minutes, business stuff, then Pepper disconnected after insisting Tony call when they were headed back.

"Would a three-some convince you to stay? I'm sure I could convince Pep…"

Bruce let out and exasperated sigh "Let it go, Tony."

"Okay, letting it go."

The conversation turned to more mundane things, of experiments, journal articles, Tony's business acquisitions, and the like. Just driving and talking like there was nothing else in the world than just the two of them in a car and the long stretch of highway. Bruce began to realize just how relaxed he was. Not the relaxation he usually achieved through meditation but that boneless full body satisfaction that usually came after a long day and a good meal. The only times he can remember feeling even close to this has been in Stark Tower, particularly when he and Tony hung out after a long day in the lab. It was a nice feeling he could get used to. "Oh crap," he thought "Do I want to be seduced by Tony Stark?" He took in deep breath of cooling night air. "Let it go, Bruce," he thought to himself, "just enjoy the ride."

Bruce realized that the conversation had died; maybe he had drifted off to sleep. It was entirely possible. He couldn't remember the last time the big guy let him sleep. He looked over to see Tony looking at him.

"Have a nice nap?" Tony practically whispered.

"Yeah, sorry."

"Don't be, you needed it," Tony continued still in a really quiet voice.

"Why are you whispering?"

"Well," Tony raised his voice just a little so he could be heard clearly over the open road, "I'm experimenting with quiet. I'm trying to understand you better and it seems quiet is very important to you."

Bruce nods. "The other guy likes quiet."

"That's what I thought. So, while you were asleep I made a point of being quiet. No humming, no whistling, no talking to myself. Then I realized how noisy my brain was so I worked on quieting that."

"So, what are your results?"

Tony hmms, "Not sure, I mean being quiet is one thing and kinda nice. You can hear the road, the breeze, your snoring. Which by the way is nowhere near as loud as I thought it would be. But when even my brain was quiet, it felt really lonely."

"Yes, it does. But that's what I had to do at first to keep the big guy under control. Just not think of anything, because I was afraid of what would make me angry and set him off. I avoided people as much as possible too for the same reason. Then I learned to embrace the anger, to make it part of me but be able to contain it, for the most part. That way I have back some control of my life."

"Control, is that why you got upset about the biomed deal?"

"Sort of. It wasn't that you did it, I appreciate that, I know you really wanted to help. I just don't trust them to not want to take complete control of the situation. Whenever I collaborate on the "hulk" problem, eventually people forget I'm still human and just start treating me like a lab rat. They think I'm being too slow and hesitant. Well of course I am, it's my life they are experimenting with."

"I promise you, if they ever try that I will snatch their funding immediately. You just say the word and the contract is over."

"I almost believe you mean that."

"I do Bruce, I don't know how to prove that to you but I do."

After yawning for the fifth time in the past five minutes, Tony decides it's time for Bruce to make a decision. "I'm going to need to head back to the tower soon; oddly I think I may actually need sleep. Please say I'm taking you back with me?"

Bruce was quiet. He wanted nothing more than to go back to his "new normal" with labs, and a regular bed, good coffee, Pepper and of course Tony. But what about the big guy, he seemed placated now but what about tomorrow, or the next day? Tony seemed to be reading his mind.

"I'm not asking for forever; just try living like a normal person a little while longer."

Bruce couldn't really argue with that, "Okay, I'll try."

Tony puts a quick call into Pepper and then finds a place to u-turn, heading back toward the city.

"Fasten your seat belts, next stop Stark Tower."

Bruce puts a hand on Tony's shoulder "Don't you mean home?"

Tony lets out a happy sigh and smiles, "Are you trying to seduce me Bruce?"

"Let it go, Tony."


	5. Temporary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Welcome Home. Don't do that again.–Pepper."

When they got back to Stark Tower Bruce and Tony were asleep on their feet. All the emotion of the day had clearly worn them out; each stumbled off to their own beds without a word between them. There was a moment when Tony considered sleeping outside of Bruce's door to ensure he would be there when he woke up. But he decided that at the very least it would be childish and just chalked it up to his definite need of sleep.

About noon they were roused by the smell of that wonderful elixir, coffee. In the kitchen a chipper Pepper had set out breakfast and the first cup of coffee for each of them on the bar. "Bruce you sit there," pointing at the barstool with a folded piece of paper on it. "Tony, there," she points to a bar stool two away from Bruce's. She takes the barstool in the middle.

Bruce opens the piece of paper inside reads, " _Welcome Home. Don't do that again.–Pepper_." He looks up to see Pepper glaring at him.

"I'm serious, Bruce." Pepper then turns to Tony. "You seem to be over dressed for the occasion." Tony looks down to realize that he had only managed to get his tie, jacket and shoes off before falling asleep.

"I'll change before going to the lab."

"And you?" Pepper turns her attention back to Bruce. "What are you plans?"

"Not sure, working in the lab sounds like a good idea."

Pepper sighs. "What is wrong with you people? Okay tonight, after lab time, I'm going to bring over a couple of pizzas and we are going to watch a movie, probably a comedy. All work and no play is probably what has got the not-so-jolly-green-giant all tense and needing to get out."

Bruce and Tony nodded in unison while draining their cups. Pepper grabbed the cups, refilled them and set the coffee maker to make another pot. "I'm leaving now. I'll be back at 8. Don't make me have to drag you out of the lab."

They were too busy drinking the second cup to much more than nod.

Bruce turned to Tony, "I don't think I've been this exhausted in a long time. But since I have my clothes on from yesterday I know the big guy didn't get out. Did I run laps in my sleep or something?"

"Emotions can be tiring, and I think you ran most of the gamut yesterday."

"Oh. Sorry."

"Stop apologizing. In fact I'm making a new rule. Dr. Bruce Banner is not allowed to apologize for anything ever. Ever, you hear me?"

"Even if the big guy destroys Stark Tower?"

"Especially if he destroys Stark Tower. Do you know how many people would be employed to rebuild this place if he did that? He'd be doing people a favor. So what's the new rule?"

"I'm not allowed to apologize."

"All of it."

"I'm not allowed to apologize, for anything."

"Ever."

Bruce sighs, "Ever."

"Great, another cup and then let's go make science. After a change of clothes of course, Armani and chemicals don't go well together."

They worked the rest of the day in their labs, Tony blasting hard rock while Bruce listening to something more sedate on his headphones. Occasionally they would stop and visit each other's projects, but mostly they were in their own worlds. Which was probably for the best since neither was ready to discuss the day before. At 8 o'clock Jarvis announces that Ms. Potts is in the elevator and on her way up. Both hastily conclude their work and head for the living room not wanting to incur the wrath of Pepper.

"Oh good, I don't have to go find you. Guess I won't have to punish you with a romantic comedy."

"Well thank goodness for that," Tony yells from the bar area. "Beer with pizza, right Pepper?" Tony had been making an effort lately to remember what Pepper liked.

"Correct Tony," Pepper flopped down the couch, and begins picking through a dozen remotes on the coffee table, "now remind me which one of these things actually controls the TV."

Bruce had to admit he actually had fun with Pepper and Tony even though the movie was horrible. He relaxed and so did the big guy and that was the important part. He even skipped going back to the lab after Pepper left. He just went back to his room, listened to some music and went to bed at something that resembled a decent hour. Maybe this would work after all.

It went on like that for weeks. Pepper would show up two or three nights a week drag them out of their labs and make them watch movies or go out somewhere. Tony made an effort to spend quiet time with Bruce. Just having a beer on the terrace, only occasionally talking and even then it was just small talk. Tony made sure to keep the topic of conversation away from the Avengers or the other guy. He just wanted to give Bruce as much normal as one could have living in Stark Tower.

But soon, normal began to fall apart. Bruce started staying up later and later, until later became morning and then a day or two without sleep. He seemed to no longer enjoy Pepper's attempts at giving him something to do besides research, he endured them. He fidgeted during movie nights. Any time they went out he would end up taking a cab back early claiming headache, or exhaustion. Just a beer on the terrace became a quick sip then mumbled thanks, since he wasn't allowed to say sorry, and excusing himself to go back and work on a project.

Things came to a head one day in the lab. Tony walked in to gather Bruce, it was almost time for movie night and Pepper had threatened a musical if she had to wait on them. He stepped through the door in time to just miss being hit by a beaker, putting his hands up in time to deflect the glass from his face as it exploded on the wall beside him.

"Bruce! What the hell?"

"Sor…didn't see you there."

"Doesn't matter if you saw me here or not, you are not the kind of person to throw beakers at walls."

"Maybe you just don't know me," Bruce mumbled under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"He's itching to get out again isn't he?"

Bruce sighed and nodded.

"I thought something was going on but you didn't say anything. Bruce you should've said something."

"I thought I could take care of it." Bruce snapped.

Tony gestured to the broken glass on the floor "Obviously not. Look Bruce, me and Pepper, we are not just people who exist in your world, we care about you and want to help."

"Who says you can," Bruce storms past Tony and out of the lab to his room where he locks the door.

It takes Tony a minute to calm down enough to follow him. He didn't want to push him over the edge but he wasn't going to let Bruce just run away from the situation. He knocked politely on Bruce's door.

"Go away Tony."

"Not going to happen. What is going to happen is you are going to open this door and we are going discuss what's going on like adults, even better like scientists."

"Go away, you are stressing me out. It's not making holding the big guy in any easier."

"Well I'll just go and put the suit on. I'll be safe and then you'll open the door and we'll talk."

"You are persistent bastard aren't you?"

"Of course, it's one of my most enduring qualities. Now open the door."

"This isn't the side of some road Tony. I can put in some earplugs and just go to sleep. You can stay out there all night; I'm not opening the door."

"I could have Jarvis blow it open."

"No you…well hell maybe you can, but you won't."

Tony sighed "You're right; I wouldn't do that to you. Open the door, please."

"There is nothing to discuss Tony, just go and have a good movie night with Pepper. It'll be much better if I wasn't there anyway."

"Fine, just promise you won't sneak out and leave while we are watching the movie." There was silence behind the door. "Bruce?" still silence. "You're going to leave aren't you?"

Bruce decided Tony at least deserved to be told to his face. He got up and opened the door. Looking into Tony's eyes he knew that there was nothing to say, his silence had already confirmed Tony's fears. So he said what he felt he was always saying to those he cared about. "I'm sorry."

"You broke my…rule Bruce. You are not to apologize."

"Then punish me then, because I'm pretty sure I deserve it," Bruce sighed and put an arm around Tony leading him into his bedroom, "Come in, let's talk about this."

Tony reluctantly let himself be led into the room and sat down heavily on the bed. "What's to talk about? You are walking out of my life forever and there's nothing I can do about it. I don't like this feeling powerless crap. I'm used to getting my way…"

"Not forever," Tony gives him a hopeful look "At least I don't think so." Tony drops his head in his hands. He knows he can't make Bruce stay, those few weeks had made him delusional that the other guy would just somehow chill until he was needed. He had hoped it was enough time for the partnership to come up with a temporary solution but nothing had worked so far and too much stuff was still in the development stage to do any good right now. All he could do was accept the inevitable. He raised his head, straightened his shoulders, and turned to Bruce. If he had to accept Bruce's leaving, he would take it like a man. He didn't become who he was by sniffling like some lovesick school girl every time someone walked out of his life. No, he stood tall and let them go. He'd just drink himself into a stupor later.

"I will accept this, leaving, on certain conditions."

"You get to make conditions? It's my…"

"One, you have to let me know where you are going."

"What so you can follow and pester me to come back?"

"No, in case there is an emergency and Fury doesn't have time to search all over for your green ass. I'm not running after you again, it's bad for my ego. Two, it's the 21st century get a damn cellphone. You must call me or Pepper every couple of days to let us know you are okay. "

"Tony I'm not a chi…"

"Don't make me change it to every night."

Bruce sighed; maybe this was the punishment he had asked for earlier. "Yes, Tony. Anything else?"

Tony cleared his throat; his resolve was starting to weaken when really thought about the tomorrow when Bruce would not be there. "Three and four," he said in a much softer tone, "Be safe and come back home."

"I promise I'll try."

They sat in silence, neither knowing the next thing to say or do. A knock on the door frame breaks the silence. A rather annoyed Pepper is tapping her watch, "Uh guys, movie night, it's not going to…"

"He's leaving Pepper." A momentarily look of hurt passes Pepper's face but it's quickly replaced by a glare at Tony.

"It's not Tony's fault Pepper. The big guy is getting worse than ever and I think we need a break from the world."

"And this time he promises to let us know where he's going and to keep in touch."

"I guess that is better than nothing." She takes a deep breath not wanting to deal with this again, "Okay, let's watch the movie."

Bruce did his best to sit still through the movie, but his mind was on other things. It wasn't that he wanted to, but he had to go. Even now it felt like the other guy was scraping the back of his skull to get out. Looking to his left at Pepper, teary-eyed at what he thought was a predictable tragic end for the main character, and to his right Tony, brooding and quiet, he realized he was going to miss them. He was glad Tony was going to make him keep in touch. He certainly wouldn't have reached out on his own.

The three of them sat past the credits until the screen was black again. No one wanting to move, because moving would be another step to the inevitability of Bruce leaving.

Bruce finally broke the silence. "I know I have no right to ask, but could you two do one thing for me?"

Pepper wiped her eyes, "Sure Bruce, what do you need?"

"Uh, um," He couldn't believe he was going to ask for it, never mind how much he needed it. Well if they said no, it wouldn't matter, he'd be gone tomorrow either way. "Would you two share my bed tonight…or I guess Tony's if that's okay? I'm sure his is bigger and more comfortable."

That seemed to wake Tony up. "See, I knew you wanted a threesome, although why wait to the 11th hour to bring up sex? Not that there is a bad time to bring up sex I suppose." It's highly possible Bruce blushed but the lighting made it hard to see, plus his hands were covering his face.

"That's not what I meant, I mean just sleep. I don't want my last night here to be alone. Never mind, it was a stupid idea." Pepper glares at Tony, even though he really can't see it, and then puts her arms around Bruce's waist, hugging him from the side.

"It was not a stupid idea, in fact I like it. Don't you Tony?"

"Hmm? Oh yes, it's a great idea," Tony was trying very hard to get the images of a threesome out of his head. "But definitely my bed, it's bigger and much more comfortable."

Tony got up and headed toward his bedroom. Pepper had to encourage a rather embarrassed Bruce off the couch. He had gotten what he wanted why wasn't he happy? The truth probably laid somewhere between being embarrassed that he needed the companionship right now and that for however a brief moment he actually considered saying yes when Tony mentioned threesome.

By the time Pepper and Bruce made it to the bedroom, Tony was lying on the bed, bored.

"Finally, I thought I'd fall asleep before you all dragged your asses in here." He didn't mention that a small part of him panicked at that thought that Bruce had decided to leave immediately. He started to think about how Bruce seemed to trigger his abandonment issues like no one else. But he stopped himself; he couldn't go down that path right now. Right now was about Bruce. "Alright bedtime children, Bruce it's your special night so you sleep in the middle."

And there they slept. Pepper sleeping on her side her arms wrapped around Bruce's left arm in not quite a death grip. Tony turned outward on the other side; he explained it was so he didn't keep them up with the glow of the arc reactor. But he didn't object to Bruce laying a hand on his hip, he didn't even make a single salacious remark. Bruce lay on his back in the middle. The most content he'd been in a while. He wasn't alone, and even if he wasn't loved, he knew there were two people who cared about him even with his burden. He wished he didn't have to leave.

Morning came too soon and it was difficult extricating himself from the middle of warmth and bliss. He woke Pepper up with his moving but told her he had to go to the bathroom and he'd be right back. What he actually did was gather up his pack from his room and started to head out. But he couldn't just go like this. So he went back to Tony's room. They were both still sleeping, and he didn't want to wake them so he just stood by the door. "Goodbye," He whispered "I'll miss you both." Then turned and headed to the elevators, down, and out of Stark Tower.

The first thought Tony had upon waking was that Bruce was gone. The second was how incredibly empty his bed now felt. "How can he have that effect in just one night?" he thought. He wondered if Bruce would adhere to the conditions or did he just agree to get Tony to shut up.

"Jarvis, location of Dr. Banner."

"Unknown at this time, although he did state that he was heading to Nevada and will call tomorrow night around eight to let you and Ms. Potts know his location." It put a momentary smile on Tony's face to know he would be hearing from Bruce again. But then he remembered it would be from a distance and barring an Avenger level crisis, possibly the only way he would hear from him again.

He managed to drag himself out of bed and into kitchen to find Pepper. There was a clear mug of brown liquid and a tall flute of orange liquid on the bar. Pepper takes the tall flute, handed Tony the clear mug, and guided him out onto the terrace. She motioned Tony to sit in one lounger while sitting in the other.

"One drink, one song, and then we go about our lives while Bruce does what he needs to do."

"What if he doesn't come back Pepper?"

"He will, Tony. What song do you want?"

"I don't know, you pick one."

"Jarvis?"

"Yes Ms. Potts."

"Leaving on a Jet Plane, one time through, no interruptions."

"Yes, Ms. Potts." Pepper lifted her mimosa to Tony, he lifted his Irish coffee to her.

"To Bruce."


	6. Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He debated a shower after dinner but he didn't want to miss making his 8 o'clock call. Punctuality showed you cared right? So at 7:58 he hits the talk button on his phone...

Bruce was out of New York by lunch time. He was relieved that Tony hadn't tried to stop him. It would've been hard not to just go back, even though he knew by going back now someone would get hurt. He hoped that it would be easy to slip back into lone traveler mode again, although he swore he could still feel Peppers arms wrapped around his, and the warmth of Tony's skin on palm of his hand. He focused on this feeling while drowning out the pickup truck driver who had stopped and given him a lift. The conversation had been interesting at first; apparently the driver had hitchhiked across the country in the 70's. But now he was a crotchety older man who complained about freaks sending the world to hell in a hand basket. "He doesn't have a clue about real freaks," Bruce thought.

* * *

Pepper kept her regular work schedule, professional as always. But between all those hectic meetings and phone calls she contemplated why she seemed to be attracted to men bent on self-destruction. Tony was a lot more obvious in it than Bruce. Bruce had just quietly experimented on himself until he became two people. Somehow Pepper still saw the other guy as a person. A big green person with serious anger issues, mind you, but he still had some good in him. He saved Tony. She saw it, if only through a bunch of shaky YouTube videos, she could clearly tell that he had intended to save Tony. So she had to think, was she really attracted to Bruce or just saw him as someone who could help her protect Tony from himself?

* * *

Tony of course threw himself into work. There was nothing he could do about Bruce but wait for his phone calls and hope he could work through the problems with the other guy and come back. That didn't mean that he didn't call a certain biomedical laboratory a dozen times; reminding them that he was paying them to fix the hulk problem, not just play around with chemicals. He probably could've used more tact, but he wasn't in the mood.

* * *

Bruce was lucky to catch this ride. Crotchety was going to West Virginia to visit his grandchildren and didn't mind having a traveling companion for the whole trip. He had recently lost his wife and this would be the first time he'd be making the trip alone. Besides a good 8 to 9 hours of not having to hitchhike, Bruce liked going through of all the wooded and unpopulated areas this route would take. Safe places to point towards if he couldn't hold the other guy in.

He must have drifted off to sleep because when he opened his eyes it was because Crotchety was knocking on the window. They were at some gas station in who-knew-what-state. After fumbling with the window controls for a few seconds before realizing they were electric and the car was off, he opened the door. Crotchety was inquiring if he wanted a snack or something. Bruce decided on coffee and went to reach for his pack to get out money. Crotchety wouldn't hear of it stating that he had one of those frequent buyer cards and headed inside to pay for the gas and get coffee.

Bruce looked at his phone; it was 5pm so they probably had another four hours to go before Crotchety would be dumping him on the side of some road before heading toward his grandchildren. He thought about calling Tony real quick just to let him know where he was headed but didn't. He needed at least a day without hearing his voice, he needed to put distance between them or he would just end up going back. He who hadn't needed people in so long was starting to crave the companionship, the normalcy of having people around him. Something about that craving was preventing him from keeping the calm around the ball of anger that he held inside. It was threatening to let the other guy slip free and then there would be no chance of normalcy again. He had to learn to control this and being around Pepper and Tony somehow wasn't the answer, no matter how much he wished it was.

"There's your coffee… dang it I forgot your name again."

"Bruce."

"Well Bruce, it's nice to meet you and I'm Bill. Bruce, I think we have about another 4 hours before Charleston, then Bruce you'll have to find another ride, Bruce." Bill chuckled. "You probably think I'm crazy but I saw on TV once this method of remembering someone's name is to mention it three or four times in the first couple minutes of hearing it. I think it makes you sound like a nutjob but it does help." Bruce made a mental note to call Bill by Bill as much as possible so he didn't end up calling him crotchety out loud.

"Well Bill, I'm sor… sorta dozed off on you there. Guess I'm not making the best traveling companion."

"Oh you're fine. Holly, that's my wife, she fell asleep every time we came down. I swear sometimes even before we hit the interstate. So I'm used to having a snoring companion. Yep me and Holly would've been married 30 years next year. But that's life, always taking something away from you."

Bruce sighed, "Can't argue with that."

"And can't do anything to change it, which is why it's important to spend as much time with the ones you love while you can. When the doctor first told us that Holly was terminal I was beside myself. I'm not proud to say it but I ran away. Stayed away three whole days before I realized that I was missing three days the good lord gave me with her. That and I was a complete jackass to abandon her when she needed me most. After that until the day she was taken away from me, I never missed an opportunity to spend time with her, to hold her, to tell her I loved her. Not every day was good, near the end there was some really bad days. But even the worst day was better than now, being alone."

Bruce really couldn't say anything, he just stared out onto highway, absently rubbing his cellphone, wishing he was back in New York watching a movie with…friends.

* * *

"Mr. Stark."

"Yes, Jarvis."

"Ms. Potts requests your presence in the kitchen area. She states she has pastries and vat of coffee and she's not bringing it to the lab."

"Breakfast? Why is she bringing breakfast at…" Tony looks at the time on his computer. "9am? That can't be right. Jarvis how long have I been in the lab?"

"22 hours, 14 minutes, and 24 seconds." Tony's stomach gurgled in agreement with Jarvis's time report.

"Tell Ms. Potts I'll be with her after a shower."

Tony had barely gotten the coffee mug to his mouth before Pepper started in. "You haven't been to sleep have you? Well at least you showered. You have a busy day today; you have a meeting at 1, 3, and 5:30. I've rescheduled your 7:30 meeting until tomorrow." Then she continued wistfully, "Bruce should be calling at 8. I'll be over then, figured we could put the call on speaker."

"Sounds like a good idea." Tony grabs a pastry and his coffee and starts back to the lab.

"Tony Stark you better be heading toward your office, I have contracts for you to sign."

Tony sighed and changed his direction and headed toward his office. At least he had something to look forward to at the end of the day.

* * *

Day two hadn't been as lucky for Bruce; he had 10 different rides and still hadn't made it more than few hours down the road. He wondered if it was the fact he was on edge that had people going only a couple of exits before dropping him off again. It was hot and it had rained a few times adding to his agitation. He promised himself if he made it to Knoxville he would get a hotel room. Sleeping, if that's what you could call it, on a wooded area off the road was not the best for keeping one's emotions in control.

He hoped he made Knoxville by 8. Cell coverage out here was spotty and besides he would like to have his conversation in private. It was only a silly phone call, just a report of where he was and that he was okay. Why was he looking so forward to it he couldn't quite fathom.

* * *

It had been the fourth time in 20 minutes Tony had looked at his watch; if you included the five times he asked Jarvis the time, he was coming across as rather obsessed. But still it was clearly after 8pm and there was no call from Bruce.

"Maybe he's in another time zone Tony," Pepper said putting her hand over the watch face. "Let's watch some TV. We can always mute it when he calls."

After Tony flips through 100 channels in about two minutes Pepper takes the remote and sets the channel to some mindless sitcom. This pacifies Tony for about 15 minutes, and then he starts checking his watch again every few minutes. Exasperated Pepper puts her hand out in front of Tony, palm up, parallel to the floor. It takes Tony a minute and a pointed look from Pepper to get the hint and removes his watch, placing it in her hand. Pepper calmly throws the watch across the room.

"I'm worried too Tony, but you are driving me crazy."

"But he hasn't called."

"I know that Tony, but looking at your watch every few minutes isn't going to help."

"I don't like waiting Pepper. It's my least favorite thing. It's sitting still, it's doing nothing. I'm not good at doing nothing."

Pepper snuggled up to Tony, pushing at his arm until he put it around her. "Which is why we aren't waiting. We are snuggled up on a couch watching TV and enjoying each other's company. If the phone happens to ring while we are doing it, we won't mind."

Tony nodded; he would at least give it a try. "You know that was an expensive watch."

"Of course, I ordered it."

* * *

Bruce checked into a motel just out of Knoxville at 7:30. It was small and not very well kept up but that also meant there wouldn't be a lot of people there to disturb him. It wasn't the Ritz or even Stark Tower but Bruce didn't care, he just wanted to stop moving for a little while.

After checking in, he walked down the road to one of those all in one Truck Stop/Gas Station/Restaurant places and picked up dinner to go and took it back to his room. He debated a shower after dinner but he didn't want to miss making his 8 o'clock call. Punctuality showed you cared right? So at 7:58 he hits the talk button on his phone and that's when he remembers he doesn't know Tony or Pepper's number.

Tony was somewhat pacified watching TV with Pepper although part of his brain was still calculating time since Bruce was supposed to call, using the show changes and commercials as approximate guides. However, Tony was also realizing how long it had been since he had spent any time like this with Pepper. He let himself take in every part of the experience; the warmth on his side she was leaning against, the pressure of her hand on his stomach, how he had been synchronizing his breathing with hers, probably the reason he was somewhat calm, and the slightly floral scent of her hair. He took her for granted and he knew it. He always wondered why she never left; it couldn't just be the ridiculously high salary he paid her. What made it worth putting up with all his bullshit?

It took several directory assistance calls and deep breathing exercises to finally get to the Stark Tower switch board. Unfortunately that night it's being staffed by a new guy. He doesn't know who Dr. Banner is, doesn't have the authority to route his call to Mr. Stark and even if he did, how does he know he's really someone who is authorized to speak to Mr. Stark. And the same went for Ms. Potts.

Bruce doesn't remember if he disconnected the call but through a green tinted haze he sees the cell phone breaking apart against the opposite wall. He's has a few moments to think about why this was enraging him so, before he realizes there is nothing he can do. He's gets off his shirt and shoes, runs through the open sliding glass door at the back of his motel room before everything goes sideways and green.

* * *

Pepper startles awake to realize she's not being attacked by a chainsaw wielding psycho, Tony is just snoring. She carefully reaches forward to retrieve her phone off the table, its 11:30pm. "Well he's apparently not in California," she thinks. She needs to get back to her place, she has an early morning meeting with developers but she doesn't want to wake up Tony, especially since she would have to tell him that Bruce didn't call. She manages to slide off the couch and has made it almost out of the room when Tony wakes up.

"Pepper?"

"Yes, Tony."

"Stay."

"I can't Tony, I have meetings in the morning."

"He didn't call Pepper, he said he would and he lied."

"Maybe he'll call tomorrow."

"He's not and we both know it. He thinks he's better off alone."

"I'm not sure he thinks he's better off; I think he thinks everyone else is."

"Shouldn't we get to decide that? Apparently not, we get to sit by the phone like some virgin high school girl not knowing where he is or if he needs us."

"You really do care about him don't you?"

"Yes, no, fuck I don't know I just don't want to see him hurt. He's too smart, too funny, and just too damn nice of a person to have to deal with this alone. Maybe if I should make a building that could withstand Hulks strength. Just let him go in there and let the other guy have some fun."

"Actually that sounds like a good idea, Tony. Maybe you should start working on that in the morning, after some sleep. I'll call you in the morning to go over your schedule."

"Pepper, stay."

"We've already gone there."

"Please? I won't cop a feel or anything. I just don't want to crawl into that big lonely bed alone. Please Pepper, just tonight."

Pepper sighed; sometimes she just couldn't tell him no. "Okay just tonight. Then I really need to get back to my place."

"Thanks Pepper, and if you want me to cop a feel I'd be more than willing…"

"Sleep."

"Yes, Pepper."

* * *

Once he can raise his head, he can tell it's at least not daylight. He's flat on his stomach, naked, and wet. "Good thing I pack extra pants," he thought. He aches all over so it takes a couple minutes to get off the forest floor and into a standing position. Everywhere around him are fallen trees, at least 50 to 100 yards back in several directions. By the coloring of the sky he knows it's still night but won't remain that way for more than an hour or two. He decides he can wallow in guilt later but first he needs to get back into his motel room before anyone notices.

* * *

Tony had been working furiously on his new project all morning. He had compiled as much footage as he could of Hulk in action and now had several computers calculating his force on various building materials with hopes of coming up with the best anti-Hulk Smash structure. He didn't have anything to do until the calculations where done so he did something different; he called Pepper and asked her out to lunch.

* * *

Bruce was glad the front desk clerk was a morning person. He was checked out and heading to the Truck Stop by 6am. He wanted to put as much distance between him and the decimated woods as he could before the sun was too high in the sky. He went inside to get coffee and was relieved to find they also sold the prepay cell phones. He also ran into a trucker that was going to be headed to Memphis and willing to give him a ride.

Ethan, Bruce made sure to get his name this time, was another talker. He was an artist who used trucking to supplement his income.

"So where you headed."

"Ultimately, Nevada."

"Anything waiting for you there, wife, girlfriend…boyfriend." Bruce turned to him startled. "No offense intended, I just trying to cover all the bases."

"Oh, no offense taken. No, no one is waiting for me, just lots of open country and not a lot of people."

"And aliens."

"Aliens?"

"You know area 51 and everything." Bruce nods. "Man I wish I could travel. I mean I'm on the road 5 days a week but it's just the same area of the country over and over again. It's not like I get a lot of time to even explore that. Besides I want to travel the world. Ever been out of the country?"

"I lived in India for a while."

"No shit, how cool was that?"

"Honestly, not cool at all. But then I was providing medical assistance to poor villages."

"You're a doctor?"

"Well, a Ph. D. in nuclear physics actually, I know enough medicine to help poor villagers."

"Still cool though. I'm an artist driving a truck. I feel like I've wasted my life."

"I'm a nuclear physicist hitchhiking to Nevada, what does that say about me?"

* * *

"Okay so just one rule for the duration of this lunch."

Pepper arched an eyebrow, "Rule?"

"Yes, just one. No business talk, meaning no Stark Industries, no S.H.I.E.L.D., and no Avengers. I just want to talk about you… well and me of course."

"Of course," Pepper wasn't sure what Tony was up to but she was willing to play along. Besides it had been a bear of a day so a non-working lunch was nice. "So what do you want to talk about?"

* * *

Ethan dropped Bruce off at the access road before the industrial park he was supposed to deliver his load. He wished Bruce luck and let him know that there were a lot of trucks that came past there heading out I-40 so he should pick up another ride soon. He was standing there for a half hour when the guilt over last night's incident started to seep into his thoughts.

He could assume no one was hurt, other than woodland creatures, but he wasn't sure. What if there were campers out there? What if he hadn't been able to get out of the motel before he changed? What if he rampaged in the direction of the Truck Stop? He couldn't be happy that there weren't any casualties, at best he could chalk it up to luck.

As if on cue, he could feel the other guy pushing to get out again. This is not fair was his first thought. He immediately squashed it. It went without saying and whining about it didn't help anything. He started working through his methods of keeping the rage monster inside but none seemed to be working. It was almost as if trying was making the other guy more determined to get out. Finally in a moment of desperation he pulled up the memory of his last night with Tony and Pepper, and everything calmed down. It was so fast that he became unsteady on his feet can fell down on the side of the road. "Well," he said to himself, "that's curious."

* * *

Pepper was a little disappointed when dessert came; this was the most fun she had had with Tony in a while. No over the top gestures, no life threatening events, just talking and being together. Midway through dessert Tony convinced her to play hooky for the rest of the day and come back to Stark Tower. Getting out of the elevator to Tony's private quarters he reaches into his pocket to retrieve his buzzing phone.

"Jarvis, transfer call to the speaker system."

"Yes Mr. Stark."

"Um hello, Tony, it's Bruce."

Tony is speechless but Pepper manages to squeak out a hello.

"Oh hi Pepper I didn't realize they transferred me to your phone."

"They didn't, it's just that you are on speaker and somehow you managed to mute Tony. What are you going to do for your next miracle, walk on water?"

Bruce had to chuckle despite how he felt.

Tony recovered from his momentary silence, "You were supposed to call last night, this is not last night."

"Sor… I sorta screwed that up Tony, forgot to actually get anyone's phone number before leaving. It has taken until now to get someone to at least relay me to Jarvis for voice recognition. I have the numbers now." You could almost hear Bruce blush through the phone. "Speaking of screwing up, if you hear from Fury, can you cover for me?"

The color left Pepper's face, "Bruce are you okay? Do you need us to come get you?"

"I'm…the same as I always am. The other guy decided to play lumberjack last night. I don't think there were any people around but there are a lot of trees down."

"Where was it, I'll have Jarvis look into it." Bruce gave Tony the name of the motel and Tony had Jarvis scan for any reports on the incident. "So now that the big guy has had his playtime you are ready to come back right?"

"I… I can't." Tony felt like he was punched in the gut. For Pepper it was a double punch, Bruce wasn't coming back and Tony was hurting.

"Why not?" Pepper tried to say with a neutral tone that almost succeeded.

"The other guy still wants out. It took all my tricks to keep him in before I called. I'm not sure why this is happening but coming back right now would just be too dangerous." There was silence. There was nothing that could be said to make the situation right. "Look, there is a truck coming down the road. I need to go. I'm leaving Memphis now; I'll call you when I get to Little Rock. I… I …I gotta go."

"You better call Bruce, or I'll have Jarvis find you."

"Be safe Bruce," Pepper says, "both of you."

Bruce is so thrown off by what Pepper says that he forgets to say goodbye before disconnecting. How could she possibly be concerned about the other guy?

Bruce managed to get a ride from the truck that had been coming down the road. He was only going a fifty miles but it was still better than nothing. Bruce hoped this guy was a talker too; he needed not to think right now.

* * *

"I need a drink."

"No Tony." Tony turned to see if Pepper had lost her mind, because she clearly had if she thought he wasn't going to drink after that. What he found was a Pepper on the verge of tears. Tony walks over to her, not sure what to do. Pepper throws her arms around him and encompasses him in a tight hug. He can smell the floral scent of her hair and feel the warmth of her arms, her body touching his. He reciprocates the hug, gently rubbing her back. After a while Pepper steps back out of the hug but grabs onto Tony's hand.

"I need not to think about all this right now," she says pulling him gently towards his room.

The love they made was intense and beautifully sad, or sadly beautiful depending on how you looked at it. But Tony had to admit it made him forget better than any drink he ever had.


	7. Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has different ways of coping with Bruce being away from Stark Tower. Not all of them constructive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs for this chapter are Half a World Away by R.E.M. and Lightning Crashes by Live.

It only takes a few hours for Bruce to get to Little Rock, Arkansas. He wasn't thinking when he said he'd call from here because calling now would just seem desperate and he wasn't desperate. Okay maybe a little. Bruce would just wait until he got to Oklahoma City.

* * *

Tony roused from his post coital nap. He couldn't remember when he had last taken time for anything close to a "nooner" and the ones he could remember paled in comparison to Pepper. Being with Pepper, his mind is focused only on her, not work, not science, and miracles of miracles not himself. His whole world in those moments was her. Her skin, her breathing, the light sheen of sweat that glossed over her skin like liquid silk, the encouraging sounds that came from her lips making him want to be the best damn lover she ever had. Seeing Pepper in the throes of climatic pleasure was one of most beautiful things he had seen in his life.

Tony decided he wanted to see that again before getting out of bed, but he turned over to find Pepper was already gone. He might have thrown a small temper tantrum before taking a quick cold shower and heading to the lab. And that small explosion and fire in the lab was just a result of a miscalculation, not the fact that Tony was getting a little tired of waking up to find people missing from his bed. He was making actual progress on his latest project that didn't involve explosions when JARVIS interrupted him.

"Sir, you have a phone call."

"Route it through. About time you called Pepper, where have you been all day?"

"Um, Tony, it's Bruce."

"Oh, my other wayward bed hopper. How's Little Rock?"

"Wayward Bed hopper?"

"Never mind, it's not important, so once again, how's Little Rock?"

"Actually, I'm in Oklahoma City. I got to Little Rock ridiculously quick so it didn't warrant a call. I was going to ask how Pepper was but I guess you don't know."

"Haven't seen her since this afternoon… I guess it's still the same day."

"Well it's eleven-forty-five your time so yeah, same day at least for another fifteen minutes. I was just checking in so I'll let you get back to your work. Oh yeah, it may be a few days before you hear from me. Kind of sparsely populated areas I'm headed toward so I'm going to stay on the road to better my chances at rides."

Tony glanced over at one of the computers still running stress test scenarios on building materials. "Maybe next time you call I'll have some good news for you."

"About what?"

Tony smirked, "That would be telling. Good night Bruce. You should probably call Pepper, even if it's just to leave a message. You don't want to be on her bad side."

* * *

Pepper answered her phone with a yawn.

"Hi Pepper, I didn't wake you did I?"

"It's okay Bruce, it's just been a hellish day, meetings, contracts… but I'm glad to hear your voice."

"I'm sorry Pepper, I should just let you go back to sleep."

"Doesn't Tony have a rule about you apologizing?"

"Yeah, don't tell him, please. I don't need another Stark lecture. They are rambling and usually stop making sense after the first couple of minutes."

"Tell me about your travels and I may find it in my heart to forget." Bruce thought about that quirky smirk of hers she made when she knew she was winning. It made him feel warm all over. Bruce rambled on for nearly an hour, every time he got her to laugh just encouraged him to keep going. He had forgotten all about going to sleep until a yawn escaped his mouth. "Oh Bruce, I shouldn't keep you up. You probably need sleep."

"I'm the one who woke you up. Guess just wanted to get all my talking in since I won't be able to call for a few days, I'll be on the road trying to get through remote parts of Oklahoma."

"Be safe then, both of you."

"Good…did you say both of you?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Well we know the other guy can respond to some orders when he's out. I figure he can hear while he's inside. So wanted to make sure he takes care of you like you do for him."

Bruce chuckles hoping Pepper doesn't notice the bitter edge to it. Truly she doesn't know about how many times he's tried to kill the other guy and himself as well. "Well maybe you're right. Good night Pepper."

Bruce had no intentions of hitchhiking through remote Oklahoma. He was going to be sticking to the major highways as usual. He just needed to not hear their voices for a while, they made him homesick. That was a great joke; the man without a home for so long was now homesick.

* * *

Pepper easily didn't notice that Bruce hadn't called in four days. She had thrown herself into her work in a way she hadn't done since she first started working for Stark Industries and was trying to impress Tony. 14 hour days filled with negotiations, paperwork, and meetings. She had little time for anything other than meals, often at her desk, and sleep. Her communication with Tony was through entries on his scheduler and little removable tags on contracts telling him to 'Sign Here.'

Although she could run away from what she didn't want to think about during the day, at night it was unavoidable. Her dreams where filled with snuggling on the couch with Bruce, light touches, sensual whispers, letting the day just melt away in his arms. Then there were the wild romps with Tony, marathon sessions so hot, she dreamed they were surrounded by flames. But then came the nightmares. Tony falling from the sky, encased in twisted metal with no one there to catch him. Bruce being completely taken over by the other guy, forever lost on the other side while the green monster takes out everything in his path, a path that was on a collision course with her. She wakes up every time before the inevitable conclusion, Tony inches away from impact, Hulks skin just making contact with her. Her fear of Tony's self-destruction had made her walk away before. Now she found herself involved with self-destruction doubled. Would she have the strength to walk away again, did she even want to?

* * *

Tony spending a great deal of time in the lab was not unusual but now it was agitating him. As much as he hated to admit it he had gotten used to him semi-domestic new normal and now that was gone, it was bugging him like an itch he couldn't reach. He had gotten used to movies and dinners out with Bruce and Pepper. He missed beers out on the terrace at the end of a long day. Of course he could have a beer by himself but it was generally not a good idea for Tony to drink alone. "This is why you don't care about people," Tony said to the empty lab, "because if you care than they can screw you over. Have you pining for them. I'm not pining for either one of them by the way."

"Are you talking to me, sir?"

"Not really JARVIS, but hey if you don't mind listening…"

"I'm always listening."

Tony thought about when Pepper and he were together. "I may need to adjust your programing. But if you don't mind, I think I want to rant a while first."

And rant he did, about the fallacy of love, friendship, and bonding. He went on about how everyone really is just in his life because they want a piece of the billionaire pie, not cause they actually cared. That alcohol was his only true friend, okay and maybe JARVIS but that's cause he could manipulate them to do what he wanted them to. He finally just stopped because it wasn't getting him anywhere. Besides, he had a great idea. He needed to flex his playboy muscle; all this normal was cramping his style.

"JARVIS, I'm going to Europe. Have the flight plan filed and alert the crew."

"Destination?"

"Hmm, search through my travel logs. Look for places where I stayed at a beach side hotel, didn't get arrested and had sex every night."

"10 places match your criteria."

"Hmm, pick a random number and file a flight plan for that location. Don't tell me. I want to be surprised."

After a particularly harrowing nightmare, Tony hadn't just fallen from the sky this time he caught fire on reentry; Pepper decided she needed to talk to Tony. But instead of him, she got JARVIS.

"I'm sorry Ms. Potts but Mr. Stark has blocked all incoming phone calls."

Oh great, Pepper thought, he's in a stupor.

"Where is Tony's current location?"

"I'm not authorized to reveal the specific location."

"Authorized? What the hell? Okay, how specific can you be?"

"I can tell you which continent."

"Continent? Where the hell is Tony?"

"Europe, Ms. Potts."

"Business or pleasure?"

"I believe pleasure."

"Fucking bastard."

* * *

Bruce had been holed up in a motel outside Oklahoma City for days. He could've pushed through and been in Nevada by now but part of him had no idea what he was going to do once he got there. He needed to think things through as much as he hated it. When he first left New York all he could think about was getting away. Of removing the bomb inside from as many people as possible. It had gotten to the point in those last days before he left that every time he looked at Tony or Pepper all he could do was see their mangled bodies, broken bones that would become reality if he lost control. It seemed to feed the rage monster's desire to get out. If this creature was part of him then how sick was he if this imagery excited his other self?

But then there was the Memphis incident where thinking of the two of them seemed to take the fight out of the other guy. Two different images that caused conflicting results. Bruce needed to bounce some ideas off someone. Formulas he was good at alone, but for theory he worked best collaboratively. He needed to call Tony.

"Hi Pepper, I must have dialed wrong."

"No, Bruce, all Tony's phone calls are being routed to Jarvis or me. He's on a trip and has blocked all calls. What can I do for you?"

"Um, not sure. Was going to bounce some ideas off of Tony, but I guess he's busy."

"Oh I'm sure he's busy, either under a table or over a starlet. What kind of ideas?"

"Well, I've been thinking about the other guy. I've been working on a hypothesis of why he's been acting the way he has. But I'm sure you wouldn't…"

"I'm not a moron Bruce, as long as it's not chemical formulas and you are not talking like an auctioneer I can keep up."

"No, no, I didn't mean to imply that you weren't smart Pepper. You have to be to run as much of Stark Industries as you do. I just figured you wouldn't be interested in the conversation.

"Why wouldn't I? I'm your friend and this is important to you so of course I'm interested."

"You're my friend?"

Pepper sighed. Why were geniuses so stupid when it came to interpersonal matters? "After all the movie nights, dinners, and events, you have to ask me that? Hell Bruce, I don't just sleep in a bed next to just anyone. Yes, I'm your friend. So come on tell me why the other guy is having tantrums."

"I think he may be jealous."

"Jealous?"

"Maybe not the best word but with all the stuff with Loki and the Chitauri he got to destroy and rampage to his heart's content. Now he's back in his cage where he belongs, so he's pissed."

"But he got out when you were in Tennessee."

"I don't think it was enough, I think he wants out all the time. He's really feeding on the destruction. Luckily there is a burnout period otherwise I fear I would never wrestle control back." There was silence on the other end of the line. Bruce was used to silence but there was that tickling panic in the back of his head that made him wonder what he said wrong.

"I think there is a flaw in your theory, Bruce." Bruce let out a shaky breath he hadn't realized he had been holding.

"Flaw?"

"Yes, I think you have a blind spot to any emotion the other guy displays besides rage."

"He is a rage monster Pepper."

"He's a rage monster that has showed he can follow orders, work as part of a team, and save other members of said team."

"Those were flukes."

"Quit being hard headed. Isn't it possible that he can evolve?"

"He, it is not a separate being, Pepper, he part of my psyche and can't evolve."

"You evolve and change don't you? You say you maintain the anger now and you can change to the other guy almost at will. So why would he just stay the same? Maybe he's accessing part of your other emotions. I don't know how, I don't understand the science behind what's going on but you can't ignore the fact he obeyed Captain Rogers, that he saved Tony. Whether it was your conscious thought or his, neither was the action of just a rage monster."

Bruce didn't want to think about this. If the other guy was anything other than rage and rampage incarnate, it would be that much harder for him to work on killing him off. "So why do you think he wants out?"

"I think he wants friends."

Bruce sputtered, "Friends?"

"Okay maybe not friends but I think the fact that the team doesn't run screaming from him has had to have an effect. And you said he may be jealous, what if he's not jealous that he can't destroy stuff right now but that you have people caring about you. The same people that seemed to have included him but he doesn't get to see them except from way behind your brain or eyes or whatever. I don't think you've ever really explained where he is when you are you."

"It's hard to explain…wow Pepper, I need to think some more about this."

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"I'm, I'm not sure," Bruce's head was spinning with the possibility of a more human other guy. "Maybe I should get Tony's feedback as well."

"Maybe he'll call when he sobers up."

"How long do you think he'll be gone?"

"Who knows? I don't even know what's wrong."

"How do you know something's wrong?"

"He's shutting people out and partying, never a good sign."

* * *

Tony was beginning to consider that possibly he was getting too old for all this night life. It didn't help matters that he hadn't really slept more than a couple hours in days and his liver had been doing the equivalent of an ultra-marathon trying to process all the alcohol he was consuming. He turned over in his super-sized hotel bed to find no one there. He was glad of that, he wasn't in the mood for an awkward good morning.

He found the phone, called room service and stumbled off to take a shower and try to brush whatever died out of his mouth He was done partying, he actually wanted to do some work. The time away had been mostly a bust anyway, no matter how many drinks he had consumed, Pepper and Bruce always occupied at least a small part of his mind. Every little bimbo was a sexual disappointment, just a function and nothing more. Not that they all weren't gorgeous but Tony somehow had gotten to a point in his life that he wanted more.

By the time Tony managed to get dressed breakfast had arrived, two pots of coffee and a sampling of pastry menu. Avoiding the temptation to drink straight from the pot Tony sat at the modest desk and had three cups of coffee and two Danishes before turning on his phone and accessing his notes. After about 20 minutes playing with the zoom and scan controls and attempting to add anything to his notes, he's about ready to throw the phone across the room. "Next time I'm bringing at least a laptop even if I'm not supposed to be working." Tony growls in frustration. A frantic search of the desk drawers yields two phone books, a couple of menus, and what had to be the world smallest notepad. He figures if he can spread out all the pieces he would make a couple decent sheets of paper. Maybe even get some adhesive tape from the front desk to hold them together. He starts to layout the paper on the desk when he notices the cream colored desk blotter, which if all the sketching was any indication he had already discovered the night before. It appears to be drawings of the facility he wanted to make for the other guy. The labeling is mostly unreadable but after some time referring back to his phone notes he can clear up most of it.

"See I'm a genius even when plastered," Tony says to an empty room. A loneliness creeps back into his bones. One that he knows that won't be satisfied with drink or yet another mediocre sexcapade. He needs his labs, he needs his home, and he needs his…friends. Tony hits a few keys on his phone, "JARVIS check me out of this hotel and get the crew set up for the journey home."

"Of course, sir. Shall I remove the block on your telephone now?"

"No. I got thinking to do. Don't tell Pepper I'm coming back yet, I want to surprise her." Tony begins collecting clothes and hastily throwing them into his suitcase. Before he leaves he grabs the desk blotter with his sketches and notes, knowing the hotel will just add the cost to his bill.

* * *

Bruce needed to get back on the road again. As much as he thought he needed to think before, he needed not to think now. He hadn't expected the phone call with Pepper to throw him as much as it did. The other guy has feelings beyond rage? He couldn't even entertain it. The other guy was a rage monster, nothing else. It didn't take much for Bruce to visualize all the destruction and death the big guy, that he, which they had caused. The guilt of his past, hit him in the gut as always. Bruce wished he could just put a gun in his mouth and let it all be over with.

No, he didn't want to think about this right now, so he checked out of the hotel and hit the road once more. He might as well try to get all the way to Arizona. Not like he was going to figure out anything soon. Maybe Tony would call then and give him a different perspective; maybe he would be willing to help him get rid of the monster.

Out on the road it is not a good day. Few people picking up and the temperature and humidity are rising by the hour. Walking on the hot asphalt shoulder, Bruce wants to strip down and walk naked but figures that will lower his already dismal chances of getting a ride. On the horizon he can see storm clouds forming. He hopes they are going away from him, while the rain would be a welcome relief he knows severe weather is pretty frequent in this part of the country. Finally, an older guy in a truck stops and picks him up. He was only going a few exits up the road, heading home, but it still meant some time out of the heat.

"Bad storm coming. You shouldn't be out here in it," The driver whose clothing and demeanor labeled him as a farmer said. "I'm headed home and you look harmless. You can ride out the storm at my place if you like. I'm only about a half-mile off the highway. Actually my farm backs up to the highway but the living part is on the other side."

"Thanks but I'm really trying to get to Arizona as soon as possible."

"Family waiting for you?"

"No… work."

"Must not pay much if you are hitching your way there."

"I've just wanted to explore the country."

"Next time, I'd suggest Greyhound."

Bruce chuckles, "Probably would've been nicer but I have problems with crowds." The farmers exit came up too quickly it seemed and once again Bruce was on the side of the road.

"You sure you don't want to hunker down at my place for a bit. I don't like the look of those clouds."

"Thank you, but no."

"Okay well if it starts up before you get another ride just run across that field there you'll see my house in no time. You don't want to be out here if tornadoes touch down."

"I'll keep that in mind." The way Bruce was feeling right now he'd almost welcome a tornado. It wasn't on his 'attempted suicide by' list, it would be interesting to see if it worked. Bruce wasn't always suicidal but when the idea presented itself, he always welcomed it in like an old friend. The old guy finally pulled off after making another offer of a place to stay. Bruce looked around to see storm clouds occupying every inch of the sky and he had to chuckle at the particular area of clouds that were a dark seafoam green.

Lightning flashed across an ever darkening sky. At first he can just see it but soon pounding thunder is playing accompaniment seconds after each strike. The storm is moving fast and soon thunder and lightning happen at the same time. Bruce can feel the static in the air crackling all around him, the small hairs along his hands and neck start to raise every couple of minutes as he can see the lightning striking the fields around him. The other guy can feel it too as he can feel his presence around the edges of his mind. Rain starts to pour down, just a light sprinkle and for a moment he considers heading toward the farm.

He decides against it, he wants this storm; he wants it all to be over. The worst part of the storm seems to be happening on the other side of the highway, the lightning now hitting the fields almost constantly. He sprints across the highway to the median, heading for higher ground and a better chance at being struck. One lucky strike, he thinks, one strike and he won't have fight anymore. He gets to the median and the rain has picked up to a steady torrent nearly blinding his way. He also feels small pellets of hail, hitting at his head, his shoulders. He wishes they were bigger. He suspects the other guy has figured out what's going on because it's taking everything to keep him in and he's beginning to lose. Not now, he thinks. Bruce worries that his exhilaration at the prospect of this possibly being his final moments is causing his control over the other guy to slip. So he focuses on his anger; anger about his life before the other guy, anger at the monster inside, anger about why he can't just go back to Stark Tower and some sense of normalcy, anger that he can't have friends, a regular job, or a relationship, or anything. He lets his anger beat back the monster and he starts to climb the embankment as the world rages around him.

It's taken a lot out of him to get to the top of hill and Bruce drops to his knees, letting the rain and the hail beat against his body. He makes no attempt to shield himself, letting the world lash out at him for all his wrongs. All his focus is holding the other guy in for as long as he can, hoping to be damaged too much to let the other guy take over and rescue him.

He realizes that the rain has died down and the lightning is more distant. It's so quiet he can swear he can hear the other guy breathing in his ear, a slow growl that's getting louder. It's confusing at first because he doesn't feel the pressure of the other guy trying to get out in fact it feels like he's backing off. Then he looks up. Bruce had never seen a tornado before, except on TV. But there it was in front of him, maybe a mile away across the field from him, getting bigger, tossing everything in its path.

Bruce stands up, "What a way to go." He is almost giddy with the thought that this could be the one thing that he can't survive. He turns for a moment, tossing his pack down the embankment into the little ditch by the shoulder. He thinks if someone finds it maybe they'll get it back to S.H.I.E.L.D., or Tony, or whoever wants it. Then he turns arms open and walks out to meet his fate.

* * *

Pepper is idly watching TV while sneaking in a much needed break. A meeting cancelled so she decided to go home before nightfall for once. The news is on but she's not really looking until she catches a map of Oklahoma on the screen then scenes of devastation. Isn't that where Bruce is, she thinks. She turns up the volume in time to hear about a series of tornados that hit the state. Momentarily relieved that weather is the cause of the destruction, she decides to call Bruce just to see if he's okay. She lets the phone ring about 20 times. Hangs up and calls again. Still no answer. Now she's worried, can the other guy survive a tornado? What if Bruce didn't transform in time? She tries Tony's phone and once again is relayed to JARVIS.

"Unblock Tony's phone JARVIS."

"I cannot do that Ms. Potts."

"Yes you can."

"That is correct but I cannot do that without Mr. Stark's authorization."

Pepper restrained herself from throwing her phone at the wall. "Okay, can you locate Dr. Banner?"

"I'm not aware of any tracking device attached to Dr. Banner."

"Can you trace his phone calls?"

"Since he is not currently using his phone I cannot pin point exactly where he is. But I can tell you the location of the cell tower he last used."

"I guess that is good enough." JARVIS gave the location of somewhere in Oklahoma. She reluctantly asked JARVIS to compare storm damaged areas of Oklahoma with the location of the cell tower. Of course they matched and Pepper felt all the strength go out of her legs. "Have Mr. Stark call me the second he unblocks his phone." Pepper stumbled to her bedroom and collapsed on her bed. She wasn't going to cry, not until she knew for sure.

* * *

Bruce is close enough now that he can feel the vacuum of the tornado pull at his body. He's so ready to go, just a few more steps… Tony. Pepper. Suddenly their faces are foremost in his mind. They'll be the ones to recover his body. Tony won't let S.H.I.E.L.D. get to it first if he can help it; he knows what they'll do to it, the dissecting, the experimenting… This will hurt Pepper, for some reason she cares about him. All he can see in his mind is her crying, Tony in a stupor, because that's how he deals with things. Even in death he'll cause pain. He can't do that to them… not like this… But it's too late he can feel the vortex lifting him up, pulling him in.

"Big guy," he thinks to himself. "I'm not sure if you can hear or understand me but don't fight the wind, you can't win. Just ride it out. I'm sorry. I'll try not to do something this stupid again." He stopped fighting the green and it covered him like a warm embrace and then everything went black.

* * *

Tony continues to tinker with his design on the long flight back to the states. He's practically buzzing, but can't figure out if it's from the gallon of coffee he's had or the excitement of finding a solution that can bring Bruce back and keep him staying in Stark Tower. Bruce. He still could not figure out what hold this man has over him. Was it just as simply the pleasure of having someone who could match, and many times surpass his own genius around, or was it something more? Tony tried not to think of things that couldn't be figured out without running tests. However, he had hours before they landed and the facility designs were as far as he could get them without a computer. Also there was entirely too much caffeine in his system for sleep.

Still, he didn't want to think about feelings, so instead he tried to think about all the stuff he needed to get done when he got back, which of course brought him to the subject of Pepper. "Pepper is so going to be pissed," he thought. Of course she would have already figured out what he had been doing while away, she seemed to know him better than he knew himself. "Is that why you continue to treat her like shit Stark?" he continued his internal monologue. He knew the answer, it was always the same. He could buy anything, but Pepper's friendship, concern, dare say love didn't come at a price. It was just based on who he was and deep down he thought he was totally undeserving. She could see past the bullshit and it scared the hell out of him. Bruce did too. Maybe that was the attraction. They saw the real him and they didn't run away. Well Bruce did but even he wasn't egotistical enough to think that had anything to do with him, just Bruce's oversized need to protect everyone but himself.

Despite all the coffee, Tony drifted off to sleep and didn't wake up until the pilot informed him they were about to land in New York. Tony made a mental list of what he planned to do. It was a short list; call Pepper, go to the lab to work up a 3D model of the facility, call Bruce to tell him the good news.

Getting off the plane he juggled the blotter and his phone, not willing to hand off the drawings to anyone else. He managed to enter the unblock code on his phone and immediately dialed Pepper.

"Hi Pepper, I'm back in states. Can you be at my place in 30 minutes I want to show you…"

"Bruce is missing Tony," Pepper tried to sound neutral but the trembling in her words and the sniffling gave it away.

"Oh he's probably just out of cell phone range."

"There were tornadoes and he's not answering his phone."

"The big guy can survive a tornado."

"Are you sure?"

Now that Tony thought about it, he wasn't entirely sure. "Be at my place, we'll find him." Tony dropped the blotter on the way to the limo; his mind was elsewhere and didn't feel it leave his fingers.

* * *

Two thoughts entered Bruce's mind when he opened his eyes, it was too bright and he hurt a lot. Bringing up a shaky hand to shield his eyes took care of the first problem; the second was going to take a while. Looking around he could tell he was in a field surrounded by debris but whether it was the field he started in or not he couldn't tell. Slowly he was able to stand and take a quick inventory. He was down to the tattered waist band of his pants and tattered but mostly intact underwear. His right ankle was sprained but could take weight, he was covered with cuts and bruises but most were already starting to heal. Looking around he saw a rise in the landscape. Assuming it was the embankment from earlier he started off in that direction, hoping to find civilization.

* * *

Halfway through his fourth call to Bruce's phone Tony finally realizes that he dropped the blotter. "Hap. We have to go back to the airport, I left…"

"That piece of cardboard you were carrying is in the trunk Mr. Stark."

"Thanks Hap. What would I do without you?"

"As long as Ms. Potts reminds you to sign the checks you won't have to find out."

"Do you like me Hap?"

"Excuse me?"

"Do you like me? Would you consider me a friend?"

"Well it's not good to be friends with your employer Mr. Stark."

"You are friends with Pepper."

"She's more of a coworker."

"Okay, assume I wasn't your employer, would you be my friend, would you want to hang out as it were?"

Happy Hogan was silent for a few minutes. "I think I would be Mr. Stark."

"There is some hesitation there Hap. You can speak freely, it's not a test."

"Well sir, I think you would be fine in small doses, you can be a bit… much."

Tony is silent the rest of the drive. He wonders how much of him will be finally too much for Pepper. She's walked away once, how much would it take for her not to come back?

* * *

When Bruce reached the top of the rise he realized it wasn't the embankment he thought it was. However, he was pleased to see what looked like a small farm about 500 yards ahead of him. As he descended the hill down towards the house he hoped his cuts and bruises weren't all healed up. It would be a lot easier to explain the lack of clothes if you look like you just lost a fight.

"Where do you think you are going perv?" The last word was accentuated with the cocking of a shotgun. Bruce stopped immediately, putting his hands up. He wasn't worried about getting shot, he'd survive that. He worried about the poor son of a bitch who was going to be facing down a monster if he pulled that trigger.

"Not looking for any trouble, just some help. It would really suck if I survived a tornado just to be shot in the back."

"Where are your clothes perv?"

"Well the parts that are not barely hanging on me are probably scattered around your farm and the rest of the county, like my backpack."

"You should've taken me up on the offer of staying at the house." The voice came from the left of Bruce but he didn't dare move. "Jessie put the gun down. Don't know why I ever let you have one to begin with. This is the guy I was telling you I was worried about." Bruce hears a very audible sigh behind him. "You can put your hands down now. Jessie, go see if you can find the rest of the cows."

"Yes sir," a much younger sounding voice said. Bruce turned around to see Jessie stomping off. Jessie was a lanky teenage boy, probably in his early teens from the look of it. Small in stature and probably shorter than his peers, Bruce thought. That probably explained the attitude.

"Come on in. I'll put some coffee on and maybe see if we can find you some clothes."

* * *

Pepper nearly knocked Tony over when he stepped out of the elevator pulling him into a tight embraced. Tony leaned into Pepper letting her hair rub against his face. He noses her hair out of the way and plants a kiss on her neck then moves his mouth right next to her ear. "I missed you too Pepper."

Pepper abruptly pushes him away. "Then maybe you shouldn't go off to Europe and block your phone."

Tony attempts to embrace her again but she puts a hand out to stop him, "I needed some time away."

"You needed some time for drunken debauchery let's be honest, Mr. Stark."

"Would it help if I told you that all the sex was lousy and I was miserable the whole time?"

"Maybe a little, find Bruce and maybe I'll pretend it never happened."

"I'm beginning to think you have a thing for Bruce."

"He's a friend."

"For now, but I think you would like that to change…"

"How many bimbos was it Tony?"

"Okay, focusing on finding your FRIEND Bruce."

"You know you care about him too."

"Of course, he's a team member…a friend."


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Never tell me it's in my best interest, or for my own good. People always say that right before they hurt me…"

"These should be able to fit you, they are my son's but he's stationed overseas and won't need them anytime soon." The older man handed Bruce a pair of cargo pants and khaki colored t-shirt with ARMY stamped across the front. Bruce chuckled to himself; he must really be in a bad situation if he had to resort to military gear. However, the clothes were warm and only slightly too big, mostly too long, the man's son must have had three or four inches on Bruce.

"Jessie's father?"

"Yeah, feel free to ignore his attitude; he's not dealing well with his dad's deployment."

"Understandable. So it' just you, him, and his mother…"

The older man shook his head, "Car accident three years ago, right after my son got deployed the first time."

Bruce let out a low whistle, "Poor kid."

"Don't let him hear you say that, has his pride and all." The old man smirked before getting up to retrieve the pot of coffee off the stove.

Bruce knew all too well about pride. "I'm sorry but I didn't get your name the first time, or if I did the tornado took it along with most of my stuff."

"Harley James. Most people just call me Harl. It was Bruce right?"

"Yes. Thank you for allowing me into your home and for the clothes."

Harley just waved him off and filled a mug full of coffee for him. Jessie enters through the back door letting the screen slam behind him.

"We lost one cow grandpa. She's way back in the field, almost to the highway. The rest look good as far as I can tell. May need to call the vet though, lot of them have cuts and such. Oh hey perv," Jessie throws Bruce's worn pack into an empty chair at the table, "Is that what you were looking for?"

"Jessie," Harley snaps at his grandson, "The man has a name."

"Didn't tell me."

Bruce extends his hand out to Jessie, "Bruce, Bruce Banner."

Jessie reluctantly shakes his hand. "Jessie James. Don't make any jokes about it either."

Bruce nodded, "Thank you for finding my pack, Jessie."

Jessie shrugs, "Wasn't a big deal, it was just lying there. You have on my dad's shirt."

"Yes, your grandpa was nice enough to let me wear it."

"S'okay, it was getting too small for him anyway. I'm going to my room."

Bruce retrieved his pack only to find that everything was missing except for his notebook that had been inside the outer pocket. The big hole on the side of the pack showed that it had probably caught on something then ripped away. Bruce cursed under his breath.

"Problem there Bruce?" Bruce holds up the bag so that Harley can see the hole. "Lost everything huh?"

"All except my notes it seems. Harl, can I use your phone? I need to make a call, it'll be collect I promise."

"Sure, it's in the living room."

* * *

"Bruce, well it's about time you answered, you had Pepper worried sick," Tony wasn't about to admit how concerned he was.

"I'm sorry, I'm not this Bruce, I just found the phone in my back yard and it was ringing."

"Then hand the phone to Bruce, obviously I was not calling you," Tony had had JARVIS continually dialing Bruce's cell phone while he and Pepper were going over casualty reports from the area.

"You need to adjust your tone young man. Your friend isn't anywhere to be found. All I see is this phone and some odds and ends in my back yard. Tornados have a funny way of dropping stuff everywhere."

Tony shook away the thought of Bruce being dropped from a very high height and not being able to turn into the big guy. "You've got to find him, now, he could be hurt or dying or…just get as many people looking as you can, I'll pay them, I have a lot of money, trust me, just find him."

"Young man I'm am 74 years old. The fact I make it into my yard every day is a miracle of God. I'm sorry your friend is missing and I have his phone but there is no way I'm going anywhere. I suggest you call the police."

"Listen here you insufferable…" Pepper put her hand over Tony's mouth.

"Thank you so much for answering the phone ma'am. We are very worried about our friend. Could you tell me what city you are in so that we can try to contact the local police there?"

* * *

Trying to make it through the Stark Tower switchboard was even worse this time since he was also trying to relay things through an automated collect call operator. After the fourth time he was tempted to ask Harley if he could just dial directly and mail him the money for the call. But Bruce wouldn't ask, he felt the old man had done more for him than he should. It's just because he doesn't know who I really am, Bruce thought.

Fifth time was the charm, the call was accepted and he was automatically routed through JARVIS who authenticated his voice and put him through to Tony.

"Hi Tony, sorry I had to call collect but I lost my phone..."

"Oh thank god, Bruce. Tony's in his lab, breaking things most likely. I have his phone so he wouldn't break it," Pepper collapsed in relief on the couch that she had been pacing in front of for at least an hour. "JARVIS please put this call through the lab speakers. Are you okay; are you hurt, do you want us to come get you…?"

"Pepper I'm fine. I lost everything but my journal, but I'm okay."

"Bruce, you son of a bitch, finally decided to talk." Tony interjected.

"Hi Tony, I was too busy before recovering from a tornado."

"How close were you?" Pepper asked.

"I was at ground zero." Bruce lowered his voice so Harley and Jessie wouldn't hear. "Me and the big guy, well I guess it was mostly him, went on the ride of our lives."

"Really, you've got to tell me everything you remember, we need to add to the data." Tony said trying to not think about the fact that they, he could've lost Bruce. "Maybe find exactly how fast the tornado was going, and then we could calculate the force the big guy was fighting…"

"I'll go into details later, just wanted to call and check in. I'll call you when I get to the next major city… oh crap."

"What's wrong Bruce?"

"I forgot I don't have anything anymore. No phone, no id, no money…"

"Hey we found your ph…"

Tony cuts Pepper off. "Don't worry about it. We can just come out there, pick you up and fly you back…"

"I can't come back yet Tony, we've discussed this."

"Well then I'm putting you up some place for a few days. I think you need some rest. And I can get a new phone out to you, some clothes and money too. You can pay me back later." Tony didn't need the money but he knew it was important to Bruce to pay his own way.

Bruce was too tired to argue, "Okay, sure… If I remember the next big city I'm going to be reaching is Amarillo, Texas."

"How soon?"

"Never know Tony, that's the great thing about hitchhiking no time schedule."

"You're insufferable you know that?"

Bruce laughed. "That's hilarious coming from you."

"Bruce, do you have something to write with? I've booked your hotel." Pepper was efficient as usual, "I'll make sure everything is to your room by tomorrow at the latest."

"Thanks Pepper."

Pepper gave Bruce the information and after a few goodbyes they disconnect. Tony headed out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"To finish some projects, makes some phone calls and then pack. You should wrap up things and pack as well; we are leaving in the morning."

"Pack? Leaving? Where do you think we are going?"

"Texas of course."

"Bruce said not to come get him, Tony. He's not ready to come back."

"Who said anything about him coming back, although once I've finished with my plan, everything will be fine and he can come home."

Pepper sighed exasperated, "What plan Tony?"

"Oh yeah, sorry just came up with it while you were giving him the hotel information. I'll fill you in later, but first I need to finalize some things."

Bruce hung up the phone to find Harley James hovering over him.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop on you son but why can't you go back? The way you talked to them, sounded like it wasn't a bad situation."

"It's not, they're not. It's me… I have … anger issues."

"You seem calm to me. I mean you were even nice to Jessie and he had a gun pointed at you at one time."

"It's kinda hard to explain Harl. I'm doing well at holding it in now but I can't forever…I need to be going. Unless you know something about the weather I should know."

"Nope storms are out of the area for at least a day or two the forecast says. I wish you would at least have some supper with us before you left…"

"Not really hungry right now and my friends have set me up with a hotel room in Amarillo; I'll get something to eat then." Bruce put his hand out and Harl shook it "Thanks Harl I appreciate all your help." Bruce grabbed the remains of his pack and headed out the back door, across the field and back on the road.

* * *

Pepper insisted on Tony at least attending his morning meetings so they didn't leave until late afternoon. Tony still hadn't let Pepper in on why they were going to Texas by the time they got on the plane. Somewhere over the Midwest, Pepper got tired of waiting. "So what is this great plan of yours?"

"It's very simple. Hulk needs a sparring partner. See I figure these little outings he's had hasn't been enough to satisfy him because he hasn't been really fighting anything."

"He was in a tornado, Tony. I pretty sure that was a fight."

"Maybe, but there was really nothing solid to grab or punch was there? So I figure he needs to work out some aggression, well maybe not aggression because he is a rage monster after all, but to bleed off some energy as it were. I mean since the Chitauri, he hasn't really been used, so maybe all that has been building."

"Maybe he just misses his team mates."

"Pepper, the monster doesn't have team mates."

"Who was fighting the Chitauri out there Tony, Bruce or Hulk?"

"Okay it was the other guy. But back to my point, I made some modifications since the suit got pretty banged up during that mission. I usually use simulators to try it out, but figure why not use a live opponent this time. Also this would buy more time until I can get the facility built."

"You mean let Hulk sling you around for a few hours?" Pepper was not quite shouting but she did give Tony her best 'are you fucking insane' look.

"Only if he can catch me."

"And where are you going to be able to do this without leveling a small town?"

"You've heard of Area 51 of course."

"Yes?"

"Fury has already set it up. Government has about 50 miles of land that is outside of 51 that is abandoned, plenty of room."

"This assumes that Bruce agrees to this."

"Of course he will. What's there to disagree with? It's logical and besides who can resist my charm? And if that doesn't work, I'm sure he'll do it for you."

* * *

Bruce was relieved to find that his hotel room was on the first floor. Even better it had a sliding glass door patio, in case he needed a quick exit. It was most likely Pepper's doing, she would be mindful of things like that. She was one hell of a woman and he didn't think Tony was grateful enough to have her. Bruce mused that if things were different maybe he could find someone like Pepper. But things weren't going to be different any time soon, maybe even ever. No relationships for Bruce when his partner would have to walk on eggshells constantly trying to avoid provoking the monster.

Bruce only managed to kick off his borrowed shoes before collapsing on the bed exhausted, not waking until the next afternoon. He ordered room service and despite drinking a pot of coffee with his food, Bruce was still very tired. The tornado must have been really taxed the big guy he thought. He tried to keep awake by sitting in one of the chairs and reading through his notes but a short time later he was asleep again, only to be awaken a few hours later by a knock on his door. Must be someone delivering the clothes and phone, he thought. He opened the door to find Pepper and Tony standing in front of him.

"Are you going to invite us in?" Tony had decided Pepper would do the talking, figuring that Bruce was less likely to snap her head off for this stunt.

"Ye..Yeah… sure." Bruce steps out of the way for them to enter. Tony places a suitcase and a messenger bag on the bed.

"Clothes, phone, laptop, and money, I think that's all, right Tony?"

"Mp3 player as well, thought maybe you'd like to listen to something calming at night."

"That's really…thoughtful. But what are you doing here? All that could've been shipped. I told you I can't go…"

"Can't we just want to see you? I have a jet I might as well use it. I distinctly remember no rule about visiting. We have the adjoining room by the way. I'm used to being higher up in a hotel but Pepper reminded me that you would be more comfortable on the first floor and…"

"This is not going to help me get better you two," Bruce snapped, then immediately felt guilty. "It's really great to see you, don't get me wrong… but I worry that it may make the other guy more agitated."

"Is he agitated right now?"

"Well no, but I think that we are both worn out from the tornado…"

"Good than," Tony points at the suitcase, "Get a shower, get dressed, we are going to dinner. I'm starving and we have reservations."

Bruce wanted to argue, he hated Tony's tendency to order people, especially him, around but the growling in his stomach decided to let it slide. He opened the suitcase to pick out something to wear, finding on top a deep purple silk shirt that he definitely hadn't owned before.

"Tony picked it out, as well as the pants underneath."

"Um well, it seemed that you had a lot of purple in your wardrobe but nothing that seemed appropriate for dinner at an upscale restaurant…"

"I've been to dinner with you before Tony, many times…"

"I know. I've been telling people you were just an eccentric scientist to explain away the doddering old professor get up you seem to love. If it wasn't for the splash of color you would fade into the wallpaper…"

"You ever considered that's what I want to do, fade into the background. That I may like being under the radar…" Bruce ran his fingers along the shirt, the smooth cool silkiness was nice, even if he wasn't intending on admitting that to Tony. "Plus the big guy is a little hard on clothing."

Pepper walked over to Bruce putting an arm around his waist and leaned her head against his shoulder. "We'll have a nice relaxing dinner then. You get to enjoy nice food; nice clothes and we get to enjoy your company. Now get a shower, the reservation is for forty-five minutes from now."

Bruce had almost forgotten again how nice it was to be touched. He let himself relax against her for a moment then agrees to get ready. He sets the shirt, pants, and jacket that he discovers further down in the suitcase on the bed laying them out gently like they are fine pieces of china. He rummages through the inside pocket of the suitcase to find underwear, socks, and another surprise, a shaving kit. He takes the underwear and kit with him to the bathroom with a promise to be as quick as possible.

Tony flops down in one of the chairs in the sitting area while Pepper begins to put the rest of the items in the suitcase away in drawers. On one trip back to the suitcase she turns to see Tony smiling at her. "What?" she questions.

"Oh no you don't want to date him at all Pepper."

"I don't, he's a friend."

"Um huh and how many friends do you unpack for? Hell you don't unpack my things."

"You are too picky where you want your things. I'm bored and it's a nice thing to do, doesn't mean I want to jump in bed with him."

"I didn't mention anything about sleeping with him Pepper, is your Freudian slip showing?"

"Look, I wasn't the one who bought him a brand new outfit. What does that say about you Tony?"

"We weren't talking about me."

"I am now." Pepper stops unpacking, walks over and sits in Tony's lap. "So what are your feelings toward my friend Bruce?"

"Purely platonic. He's a fellow genius, Avenger, business partner, and friend who deserves to be treated a lot nicer than he has been." Pepper just stared at Tony for a few seconds then arched an eyebrow letting him know she didn't think he was finished. Tony sighed, "Okay I don't really know or understand if there is something else. He, well he just makes you want to take care of him. You seem to be affected by it as well. And him being away, it's like you being away and when you both were ignoring me I thought Europe was the answer. But it sucked, it was empty, all the jiggling bodies and booze flowing and I wanted to be home watching movies with you two. What is happening to me Pepper; am I getting old…?"

Pepper pulls Tony into a kiss. It was meant to be a gentle kiss, one to stop his rambling and let him know she understood but it ignited something in Tony. Suddenly his hand is at the back of her neck, in her hair pulling her closer, pressing her lips harder to his. When he moves his head back slightly Pepper takes his bottom lip between her teeth biting gently, sending a sharp tingle though Tony, causing him to arch his back in pleasure, lifting them both slightly up from the chair. This just intensifies the kissing and neither hears when the shower stops or when Bruce enters the room drying his hair.

"Oh, sorry I thought you two had gone to your room to change." Bruce alternates between trying not to look and to cover his body with the small towel.

Pepper out of politeness, tries to disentangle from Tony who is not getting the hint. Pushing hard on his shoulder finally gets him to stop. Tony goes on the defensive, "We are already dressed and you would be too if you weren't gawking."

"I wasn't gawking."

"Then why are you blushing? I wonder if the hulk blushes, we could call him the Christmas Avenger, although he'd probably be more like Krampus then Santa. You have heard of Krampus right?"

Bruce grabs he clothes up and retreats back into the bathroom, "I'll be ready in a few minutes, and I wasn't blushing."

Tony and Pepper look at each other and smile "Yes, he was." And dissolve into a momentary fit of laughter. Pepper gets off Tony's lap and returns to the bed to unpack, first picking up the messenger bag and handing it to Tony. "We have a few minutes why don't you plug in the computer and phone for him."

"Sure. Hey Pepper I see now why you want him, the blushing thing was kind of adorable."

"And what about you?"

"This is not about me."

"Tony it's always about you and you are evading the question."

Tony wasn't sure, and that bothered him more than Pepper realized. What should be a direct no, he only had a drunken interest in men at most, couldn't honestly be characterized as so. This bothered him; Tony didn't like not having answers. "I've got to set up equipment; we'll be leaving soon for dinner."

"Is it okay for me to come out?" Bruce called from the bathroom. "I don't want to interrupt anything."

"Get your blushy ass out here we are going to be late," Tony called back.

Bruce comes into the main room putting his jacket on, "I just need to get shoes and I'll be ready…Why are you both staring at me?"

The room was quiet, "You look…nice." Pepper whispers.

"I think I pick out clothes very well don't you think?"

"I don't even want to think about how much this all cost, Tony. Shoes?"

"In the closet, Pepper put your stuff away."

"You didn't have to do that Pepper, but thanks."

"No problem, just killing time until you were ready."

Tony started to head for the door, "Speaking of ready, can we go now? I'm starving."

Midway through the main course Bruce had to admit that he was kind of happy they came out to see him. It was almost like he never left, except that they were in Texas. The conversation flowed naturally as they talked about almost everything, work, projects, and even the different people that gave Bruce rides.

It was nice but Bruce couldn't help but remember why they were in Texas and not in New York. He had left. He was constantly agitated at the end and the big guy had wanted out. The nice dinners and movie nights became too much or maybe too often, he never could figure out what had made them become so unbearable. Then it dawned on him. It wasn't so much about wanting his company as they were designed to keep the other guy inside, placated. And after he told them about the tornado here they were trying to fix him again. Now he was glad he hadn't brought up the fact that he had taken on the tornado voluntarily. It was amazing they hadn't come out after Tennessee. But maybe it had been too soon, too small, maybe Pepper had gotten Tony to be patient.

Bruce was amazed that Tony's patience had lasted this long. He had thought it would be different this time, that someone may genuinely have an interest in him, not the big guy. He should've known better. When they first met, one of the first things Tony had said to him was how he was a fan of how Bruce turned into a big green rage monster. He wondered how Tony planned to use the big guy, because it was becoming more obvious that he certainly wasn't going to help get rid of him. Pepper felt the same way; she was trying to get him to communicate with the other guy. And yes, maybe it worked with the tornado and maybe he was evolving a bit. But what everyone seemed to keep forgetting was that he was dangerous and deadly and no matter how much Bruce tried, the monster couldn't be fully controlled. When he got out, people got hurt, people died. That may not be on their conscience but it was definitely on his.

While Bruce was lost in thought dessert had arrived. "So I guess I should let you in on the other part of your surprise. The first part of course was us being here." Tony says as he starts into his dessert.

"You mean the one you mention on the phone."

"Hmm? Oh no that's a different surprise; I'll tell you about that when we get back to the hotel. I need the laptop to show you that one."

"Okay then what is it?"

"I've arranged some sparring time for me and the big guy."

"Sparring?"

"Yeah, it's all set, not a person for 50 miles, all trees and hills. I've made some upgrades to the suit since the Chitauri and need to test them out and I think Hulk needs to smash a few things, burn off some testosterone as it were…"

"And did you think to ask me beforehand if I wanted to be your crash test dummy?" Bruce says as he sets his fork down a little too hard, "Fury in on this?"

"Yes and no. I needed him to push through the permissions but S.H.I.E.L.D. won't be there."

"Are you really that naïve Tony? They'll find some way to monitor it or are you monitoring it through the suit?"

"Look," says Tony way louder than he meant getting the attention of all the tables around him, "I'm not doing this for me or Fury or S.H.I.E.L.D. I'm doing this for you, for your own good."

Bruce pushes the chair he's in back harshly and gets up from the table, "Do you have any idea what is for my own good? Cause Mr. Stark I don't think you have even the vaguest sense of what's in your own best interest, otherwise you wouldn't be jetting off to Europe in search of alcohol poisoning and STD's." Bruce turns and walks to the restaurant exit.

Tony would have appreciated the wittiness of Bruce's comeback if he weren't so mad. Why it is that everything he tried to do for Bruce just ended up biting him in the ass. "Well at least I'm not the one who is always casting himself as the tragic figure, who pushes away anyone who tries to help. I know what is for my own good even though I may not always follow it. When is the last time you ever thought about yourself and what you want, what's in your best interest?"

Bruce stops, turns around and walks back to the table, his face comes within inches of Tony's. "I think about myself every day. I think about how much I'm responsible for all the damage I've caused," Bruce said through gritted teeth, "And how I have no one to blame but myself, I caused this, I brought the monster into the world." Tony could see a deep sadness in Bruce's eyes even though everything was tinged in green. Tony also realized how much control Bruce was exerting over the other guy at this moment and couldn't be upset at him, if anything he idolized him more than ever. "And Tony," Bruce voice crackled from the strain, "Never tell me it's in my best interest, or for my own good. People always say that right before they hurt me… I need to go now." Bruce turns and runs out of the restaurant.

Tony finishes his glass of wine and then takes and finishes Pepper's as well. "That went incredibly well don't you think?"

"Should we go after him?"

"No, if screaming starts I guess I'll have to call Fury. Then I'll probably just get in the line of fire because…" Tony slams his fist against the table. "How did I screw this up Pepper, it seemed perfect and I just don't understand." Pepper puts her hand over Tony's fist, gently caressing it with her fingers.

"You are used to getting whatever you want; he's used to having things taken away from him. What he fears most, I think, is that he's going to lose his freedom. And you took away a little of that when you didn't ask him first before planning this."

Tony turns to Pepper, looking slightly confused, "But I'm doing this for him…"

"I'm not saying you were wrong Tony, just getting you to see it from his side. Remember when Fury was pressuring you about the Avenger's initiative? Kind of like this. Maybe he'll come round to this when he sees the how it will help… I think we should go now, I'm tired of being stared at."

Tony and Pepper are surprised and relived that when they leave the restaurant that everything seems normal as far as they can see. They drive back to the hotel in silence. When they get to the room, they dive into work on their laptops, each trying not to betray how worried they are about Bruce. Putting on his headphones, Tony has JARVIS hack into the local 911 system and monitors their calls, hoping he doesn't hear anything that will make him have to call others in. Neither checks the room next door, not sure of what they would say if Bruce was there.

Three hours later there was a knock at the adjoining door. Tony looks at Pepper and points to the door, not wanting to answer it himself and somehow screw things up again. Pepper sits her laptop on the coffee table, takes a deep breath to calm her nerves, and walks over opening the adjoining door. Bruce is standing there, still in his clothes from earlier, holding a bag stamped with the name of a local bakery.

"I didn't know what the appropriate 'I'm sorry I was an ass' gift was so I got a sampling of everything that still looked fresh. Can I come in?"


	9. Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "How many times am I going to have to explain this to you before you actually accept it?"

Pepper smiled, "Of course you can…"

Tony looked up from his laptop, "Are you going to yell at me again?"

Bruce didn't quite meet Tony's gaze, "I'll try not to Tony, you just hit a nerve."

"I do have that effect on people…okay come on in. I'll call room service for some coffee."

Bruce began emptying the contents of the bag onto the coffee table. Tony retrieved a chair from the little writing desk for Bruce, who collapsed into it dropping his head into his hands. "So much for a nice dinner, you two probably should've just stayed in New York."

"No," Pepper interjected. "We haven't seen you in what seems like forever. We had to see you."

"Well now you've seen me and know why I can't go back. I'm still too unstable especially when people insist on trying to fix me when I didn't ask for their help. I'm well aware that I carry a very dangerous monster inside, but I'm not helpless." Bruce took in a deep breath, held and released it. He did this several more times before he felt safe enough to resume talking. "I assume you can fly back in the morning. Sorry I wasted…"

"Stop apologizing!" Tony yelled, and then quickly adjusted his volume, "No one expects you to be perfect. Hell you've managed to deal with the other guy better than most people would have. I saw how much control you had in the restaurant; I couldn't do that on my best days. I've never thought you helpless Bruce. You so much stronger than the rest of us; Cap, bird boy, the demi god… hell you're probably even stronger than Romanoff and she has a lot of control. But that doesn't mean you can't use help. And that was all I was offering, help."

"No other agendas Tony?" Bruce arched an eyebrow, "Is Mr. Stark becoming altruistic?"

"Will you two stop arguing, I don't want a repeat of dinner…"

"No. I want to answer this Pepper. Yes, I had an agenda, I always have one. You want to know what it was Bruce? I set all this up, went to Fury for a favor, flew halfway across the country, for one reason. To make it so you could come back to Stark Tower…"

"Why? So you have exclusive access to the other guy? Think you can control him? Good luck, because I've been working on this for years before you came around…"

"I could care less than a shit if the other guy was around. He serves a purpose, he's a good fighter, he saved my ass, but if tomorrow you couldn't change into him I'd still want you in Stark Tower. You are so much more than what you carry inside. You need to learn to accept that there are people who care about the man and not the monster." There was a polite knock at the door. "Oh thank god, coffee."

Everyone was quiet as they drank their coffee. Bruce got up and wandered back into his room, coming back minutes later changed into something more casual. "I was feeling a little over dressed for the occasion." The truth was he stalling; he didn't know how to react to what Tony said. Since the other guy appeared, people have wanted him almost exclusively for his expertise on Gamma radiation. If it wasn't for the Tesseract he's not sure S.H.I.E.L.D. would've brought him in. And when the final battle came it wasn't Bruce to rescue with a gun, or an arrow, or his fists; it was to unleash the monster back into the world.

"So what if I wasn't in Stark Tower, what if I was say, in the woods of Vermont but still kept in contact. Would you still care about the man and not the monster?" Bruce still didn't believe that Tony didn't have another agenda, everyone had multiple ones.

"I wouldn't be happy, but I would learn to accept it and probably email you incessantly…"

"Why wouldn't you be happy Tony? No ability to monitor and experiment on…"

"Fuck the big guy Bruce. I wouldn't be happy because I'm selfish. I like to keep everything that important to me close, very close. Why do you think Pepper lives in the Tower? I mean besides the fact that commuting in New York is a nightmare."

"I'm important to you?"

"Yes, you are my favorite lab partner, Dummy doesn't get my jokes. You're a really great person, we both think that. I can't put it into words but there is just something missing when you're not there. I mean I can get along fine if you weren't there I just preferred you were."

"Are you trying to seduce me again, Mr. Stark?" Bruce said, hoping to derail the conversation. It was making him antsy, confusing him, and causing him to lose focus. He could feel the other guy trying to seep in through the cracks.

Pepper spit out the coffee she had just taken a sip of. "Again? Did I miss something?"

Tony waves off the question, "It was when I went to get him to come back and he misunderstood my compliment. You're trying to change the conversation Bruce. I'm not letting you do that."

"Then I can't talk anymore." Bruce took another deep breath but was unable to hold it and shuddered out the breath. The next inhale was shaky, followed by a quick exhalation out. "I can't do this, too confused, can't focus."

"What's confusing Bruce?" Pepper said her voice full of concern.

"How I feel, how I feel about… I'll be right back" Bruce got up and quickly walked through the adjoining door, seconds later they heard the door to his hotel room open and close.

"Feel about what?" Tony asked Pepper.

Pepper didn't answer but pointed to Tony. Tony shook his head and pointed to Pepper. Then both of their eyes widened as they realized a third option. Both Tony and Pepper pointed at the other then at themselves.

"Poor Bruce," Pepper whispered.

When Bruce's bare feet hit the hot asphalt of the parking lot his thinking came into sharp focus. He was being extremely stupid. Not wanting to go back into his room, he made a quick move back to the sidewalk around to the front of the building and set on one of the stone benches flanking the front entrance.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?" Bruce muttered. Anger he knew how to deal with, science he was a genius with, but apparently he had the interpersonal skills of an awkward teenager. All that time alone he had lost more than he thought.

Could this be the cause of all his problems? Couldn't be, he knew he enjoyed the company of Tony and Pepper. The fact that they considered him a friend made it even better. But feeling anything more for them? Of course not, Pepper was off limits. She was Tony's girlfriend, although he had to admit not exclusively if the Europe trip was any indication. As far as the issue of Tony, Bruce had never been attracted to men, ever, so anything he felt for him was strictly friendship with maybe a little hero worship. Right?

"Focus Banner," Bruce hissed at himself. "Focus on what you need." Two thoughts came immediately to mind, stability and safety. Stability was for himself, when he was stable the big guy was easier to control. Safety, of course, was for everyone else and keeping the other guy away from them. The most stable he had been since India was in Stark Tower, as long as he didn't think too much about others motivations and his own feelings on the matter. Bruce knew now what he needed to do, focus on stability, focus on getting…home.

Bruce entered his room, slightly surprised to find the door between the rooms still open. He gets to the door frame and both Tony and Pepper look up "Um Tony, if we did do this sparring thing, when would it be and what would it entail?"

Tony smiled, "Whenever you want. We could do it tomorrow if you are willing to fly. And I suggest flying because I'm told I'm annoying to be around if a car ride is more than an hour. As far as what it would entail, I wanted your input on that."

"And no people around."

"Nearest people will be on base 50 miles to the south of our location. Its government land. We can have them do a scan beforehand if that would make you feel better."

"That's okay. Let's do this tomorrow before I change my mind."

"Great. Okay, I need to make a couple calls and then we'll work out the details of the exercise…"

Pepper yawned, "Why don't you all do that in Bruce's room. Normal people like me need sleep.

Tony and Bruce debated the details of the next day's exercise. Tony pushed for more extreme maneuvers, while Bruce kept simplifying the plan, not trusting the other guy. Sometime before dawn they finally arrived at a compromised plan they both could live with. After a short nap, Tony woke up Pepper and they got dressed, packed and checked out of the hotel. Soon they were on the road headed to a private air strip where they would board the plane to Nevada.

"Are you still sure about this Bruce?" Pepper inquired.

"Not sure but I need to do this. Everything I've tried so far hasn't worked."

"Tony, do you think you could arrange for me to stay on base while you two have fun? I'll go crazy in a hotel room."

"Okay although I would think that a hotel room would be more comfortable. You are not going to know what is going on anyway. No monitoring of any kind like I promised."

"Yeah well, I feel better at least being in the same zip code."

Tony patted Pepper's hand. "It's going to be fine Pepper, just a little sparring practice."

They were all quiet on flight to Nevada. Pepper insisted on giving both of them a hug before they got on the helicopter to be dropped off in the exercise zone. Tony waited until the helicopter had left before suiting up.

"Last chance to back out of this craziness Tony, if things go wrong there is…"

"I have JARVIS on board as usual. Strictly to monitor the suit and my vitals, I got it covered. Are you ready?"

"As much as I'm going to be. Be safe Tony, leave me here if you need to." Bruce walks past Tony, between steps five and six Bruce leaves and the rage monster is out to play. Tony blasts about twenty feet straight up in the air. He looks down to see the Hulk, while looking around him, hasn't moved. He circles around just out of reach but all the other guy does is just follow him with his eyes.

"I don't think he's sees you as an enemy sir," JARVIS states answering Tony's unasked question.

"Well fuck, this was unexpected." Tony shoots one of the trees behind Hulk with a beam. Hulk turns and runs to that area as if to find what Tony was shooting at. Finding nothing he punches at some of the trees in frustration. "It's like playing fetch with a dog," Tony sighs. "I guess I could shoot him, which should get him to attack."

"That may prove to be unwise sir. He may not understand the difference between provoking and an ally turned enemy. That could make future missions difficult."

"There is that." Tony randomly shot in a couple of directions to keep Hulk busy. Then he landed back on the ground to think about how to fix the problem. Tony gets a few seconds warning from JARVIS before he has the big green rage monster towering over him letting out nearly ear splitting bellow. Tony slowly backed up, not wanting to provoke an action this close, the other guy didn't move but roared at him again. "Think he's annoyed I sent him after non-existent targets?"

"Possibly or he's upset that there aren't more targets."

"Let's go with more targets." Tony shoots into a few more random areas then tries to get into one area before the other guy does, to see if he is perceived as an enemy. The big guy just rushes past him after a moment's glance, trampling after the 'real' enemy. "JARVIS when we are done here, save a record of this whole exercise. I'll show it to Bruce some day when he will actually believe this wasn't my intention."

"Yes, Mr. Stark."

Tony kept up imaginary enemy fighting for another hour or so. When Tony took another break Hulk came back and bellowed at him. However, Tony could tell that there just wasn't as much punch behind it as before and decided maybe this was enough play for today. Tony opened the face mask of his helmet and tried to remember how Capt. Rogers spoke to Hulk in the field, since it seemed he was the one who could get through to him.

"Um Hulk, good job. Hulk stop. Hulk done." Tony felt like an idiot but it seemed that the rage monster understood and just stood there breathing heavily. After a few minutes he seemed to start to deflate and moment later he was Banner again, barely able to stand. Tony caught him before he completely collapsed and helped him down to the ground. "JARVIS let the base know we are ready for a pick up, and let Pepper know we are both okay."

By the time the helicopter arrived Bruce could stand mostly by himself. However, by the time they were back on Tony's private jet headed towards Las Vegas, Bruce was fast asleep.

"I couldn't get anything on the first floor but did manage to get a fairly private suite on the higher floors. It'll be real quiet up there." Pepper took a moment to glance at Tony before continuing her watch over Bruce "Are you sure he's fine?"

"Yeah, being the other guy wears him out. Sleep and lots of food and he'll be good as new."

"So how did the sparring go? The suit didn't look like it had a scratch on it. So upgrades are good?"

"I don't know. He wouldn't touch me. Apparently Hulk doesn't hit team members anymore."

"Interesting, you should tell Bruce. So what did you do out there?"

"Played fetch."

Tony was relieved when they finally got Bruce into bed at the hotel. He had looked so exhausted that Tony wanted to carry him but knew Bruce would've objected so he just lent a much needed shoulder. After getting most of Bruce's clothes off and him under the covers, Tony decided to lay down beside him just a few minutes to make sure he was okay. He drifted off to sleep to the sound of Bruce's snoring and the distant sound of Pepper in the main room on a conference call. All was right in his world.

He was awakened later by a violent twitch from the body next to his. He looked down to see Bruce's arm lying almost protectively across his stomach, his hand clenched into a fist. Bruce twitched again and Tony gently began stroking Bruce's arm. Bruce pulled his arm back, opened his eyes and, with effort, unclenched his fist. "Sorry."

Tony turns on his side to face Bruce, "No apologies remember. You okay?"

"Yeah just a nightmare, why…"

"About what?"

"Harlem… Why are you in bed with me?"

"Just making sure you were okay. You seemed more exhausted than usual after a visit from the other guy."

"Yeah," Bruce's eyes widened, "He didn't hurt you did he?"

"Not one scratch, hell he never touched me. Apparently I'm on the Hulk's 'No Smash' list. I suspect the rest of the team is on it as well."

"Interesting," Bruce stretched and ran his hand over his face, "wonder why I'm so tired then."

"Oh that's because we played fetch for a couple hours."

"Fetch?"

"Yeah, I shot at imaginary targets; he'd go looking in the direction for hostiles, destroy a few trees and rock formations in the process. I told you I'd let him burn off some energy. So do you feel him still?"

"I'm always aware he's there Tony. But," Bruce lay quietly for a few moments, "he's not pressing to get out. Hell, I would almost say he seems strangely content or quiet or something. But still I'm not letting my guard down."

"I wouldn't want you to, at least not about this."

"Hmm?"

"Nevermind. I bet you are starving. I should order room service, I'm sure Pepper is probably hungry as well. Do you want to eat out in the main room with us or I could bring it in here to you…?"

Bruce smiled briefly at the idea of Tony bringing him dinner in bed but shook the idea away, "I think I'll eat out there. I'll be sleep again soon enough might as well enjoy being upright for a while. I need a shower, can you just order me whatever you think I would like and I should be out before the food comes up."

"Is half the menu okay?"

Bruce chuckles, "Sure, and a pot of coffee."

Bruce turns his back to the showerhead letting the hot water relax the knots in his shoulders, tension leftover from his dream. He muses about how nice it was to wake up and find himself in a bed and more importantly someone next to him. He vaguely remembers the trip from the field to the hotel but he does remember that every time he opened his eyes, Tony or Pepper was there. Usually when he woke up from being the other guy he was either alone or someone was screaming or hitting him, many times both. The worse was when he'd wake up in a cell or with a gun pointed at him. He much preferred waking up like this.

Soaping up his arm, his fingers graze against his skin reminding him of the feeling that woke him. Tony finger touching him, apparently trying to soothe him from the nightmare he was having. Now he regretted pulling away, but he had been confused between the dream and the touch and couldn't remember where he was. It was nice being touched; it was nice having someone not run away when he was having emotions. He closed his eyes while continuing to rub small circles along his forearm, imagining it was Tony comforting him from the nightmare. Soon his mind wandered about where else those hands could rub comfort into. Bruce eyes opened suddenly and he focused his thoughts more to scrubbing the Nevada dirt off his skin.

"Of course," he says as he opens the shampoo bottle and is immediately greeted with the barely there floral scent that reminded him of Pepper. He seemed to not be able to escape these two. How did they so become entangled in his life? Was it simply the fact of living in Stark Tower or was there actually more to it? He hadn't thought about any relationship, which this was not, in his life this much. Stuff just kind of happened. But now that he toted around a rage monster he felt the need to be more cautious, more introspective. "I should've studied Psychology," echoes against the walls of the shower. He pours the shampoo into his hands and begins to lather his hair while he imagining touching Peppers hair, allowing his fingers to glide gently through her hair, maybe even curving his fingers around her hair and… He vigorously washes his hair, as if to wash the images out of his head. Then after finishing his shower with a very cold water rinse, hastily dresses and joins the others in the main room.

"You know I was kidding when I said half the menu was fine." Bruce said as he saw all the food that was on the table.

"That's not all yours rage boy, Pepper and I haven't eaten either."

"You didn't have to wait for me."

"Yes we did," Pepper points for Bruce to sit down. "I want all three of us to have a nice meal together. No arguing, no leaving, agreed?"

Tony and Pepper talked mostly business. Stopping ever so often to make sure that Bruce was okay, getting enough food, topping off his coffee. On one hand, it felt nice being taken care of, but on the other Bruce was wondering how it would be living in Stark Tower once the shine of living with the man with the monster inside wore off. Would they ignore him, would he become just another Stark employee banished to one of the lower lab levels? Could he accept it when he was put on the shelf with all the other curiosities of Tony Stark? Would it be more difficult to keep the monster inside if that happened?

"Anything wrong? You've been holding that piece of bread in the air for a couple minutes now." Tony inquired.

"No, nothing wrong just lost in thought."

"Fantasizing about what could've happened there in bed with me?" Pepper immediately smacked Tony in the back of the head. "What? Tell her Bruce, I'm right aren't I?"

"Everything isn't about you Tony…although I was partly thinking about you, and you too Pepper. And no Tony, there wasn't a bed involved..."

"Oh other furniture, I never pegged you as kinky. Ouch! Pepper if you cause a concussion my hospital bill is coming out of your salary."

"Like you'd ever go to the hospital. What were you thinking about Bruce?"

"Well, I know you are probably heading back to New York tomorrow and I have to decide whether or not I'm coming with you."

Tony was still rubbing the back of his head, "I thought that was a done deal. I mean didn't today's exercise help at all?"

"I think it helped a lot. I'll probably know more in the coming days but yes it seemed to take the edge off a lot. I would've never thought that would work. And then there is this whole new data about him not attacking you that I've got to try and understand at some point. But that's not the only issue here."

"What is the other issue?"

"You two. I'm not used to having friends. I wasn't exactly all that popular before the other guy came along. And now I have two wonderful people who seem to think I'm worth having around. It's confusing to me and I find myself waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting to the newness of being friends with the freak wears off."

"You are not a freak…"

"Yes, he is Pepper, and hey guy with an arc reactor in his chest over here, I'm a freak too. But then I was a freak before this. People who prefer the company of numbers and machines over other human beings are freaks. Really the only reason people act like I fit in now is because of the money and probably the whole Iron Man thing. So when the newness of you being around wore off, yes it wore off long time ago, what happened Bruce is that you became part of my life. I expected you to be somewhere in the building, probably in the lab. I actually looked forward to drinking a beer with you and having those great conversations where I didn't have to dumb it down or try to one up. It was nice having one other person in the world besides Pepper who didn't care about my money, my prestige, or my cool toys. Someone that seemed to care about me no matter how much of an ass I can be." Tony sighed "How many times am I going to have to explain this to you before you actually accept it?"

Bruce just stared at Tony, he was waiting for him to break out in laughter or at least plaster on one of his insincere smiles. But no, Tony just looked back at him, sincere and almost as if he was holding his breath, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Pepper broke the silence.

"Newness wore off a long time ago for me too. I admit at first you were kind of a replacement friend. I missed Phil…Agent Coulson a lot. Most people look at me as Tony personal secretary or someone to fear, but Coulson treated me as a friend and you do as well. It wasn't all about Tony with you and that meant a lot. And I feel like Tony, I expect to see you around the Tower now and am sad when I don't. I think when you come back, if you come back, maybe we should do stuff together just you and me. We both could probably use more friends."

"I…I don't know what to say."

Tony let out an exasperated sigh "Say you're getting on the fucking plane tomorrow and coming home."

Bruce took a deep breath and let it out, "Okay I'm getting on the plane tomorrow."

"And coming home. Say it."

"And coming home."

Tony clapped his hands together, "Great, now finish up your food, I'm in the mood for a movie."


	10. Scientist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Tired of theory and hypothesis wanted to move to experimentation."

The next morning Bruce woke up feeling a little more human. He turned to roll out of bed and had to catch himself before hitting the floor, because he was on the couch. Luckily no one else was in the main room so Bruce got up and stumbled toward his room. By the time he was showered and dressed he could hear sounds in the main room and decided to see if there was coffee before packing for the trip back.

"Sor… I didn't make it through the movie, hope you enjoyed it."

"Wasn't expecting you to, but figured you needed to relax. Besides, your snoring helped keep me awake during a very boring movie." Tony said flashing one of his quick smiles.

"He's joking Bruce. He just doesn't want to admit he cried during a chick flick."

"There was no crying, if there was it was from being tortured watching that clichéd crap. Or probably the dryness of the Nevada desert or allergies or…"

"Is there any coffee?" Bruce chuckled, deciding to save Tony from digging a bigger hole. He was so going to enjoy being back in New York. He did a quick mental check to realize that the other guy was still far in the background.

Pepper pointed to the carafe on the table, "You seem happy this morning."

"Well the other guy is calm, life's good."

* * *

When they get back to the tower, Pepper was off to her office to sort out some administrative mess, Tony was off to his lab to work and Bruce was left to fend for himself.

First he headed to his room to unpack. Everything is the same just waiting for him to come back. He then decides to head to the lab to see if Tony had reclaimed his area. He is surprised to find it also the way he left it. There are a few new folders on his chair, detailing new projects that need his assistance. He picked up one of the folders at random and after looking over the details began setting up his equipment, began putting the days on the road out his mind.

Bruce was able to push thoughts of the road away for another day or two. Then he realized that he needed to send the clothes back as he promised. He picks up his notebook, flipping through the pages looking for a blank sheet, and begins to skim some of his notes. All of it an introspective observation of his life on the road, as well as the other guy's reactions to what was going on in his mind. He hadn't written anything about the tornado incident and thought now probably would be a good time. He pulls out a pen and starts to write about it then stops. Acknowledging that he actually began trying to communicate with the monster would mean accepting that maybe it didn't need to be destroyed. But a good scientist doesn't ignore information just because it didn't support their initial theory. With a sigh of resignation he continues to write.

A week after returning to Stark Tower movie night resumed. Pepper stopped by the labs around noon to let them know they needed to wrap up whatever they were working on by seven. She was picking up Indian food and the night's movie theme was Bollywood. Tony grumbled that the food better be good to make up for the movie, but both of them were out the lab and had plates and drinks ready when Pepper arrived.

In the end Tony begrudging enjoyed the movie and Bruce was glad to be spending time with them again. After the movie, Pepper headed back to her apartment, but not before giving them each a kiss goodnight. For Bruce it was a quick, unexpected peck on the cheek. For Tony it was way more involved and Pepper had to push away from before she convinced herself to stay. After the doors to elevator closed Bruce turned to Tony to say good night before heading off to bed.

"What? No kiss goodnight," Tony said, with one of those enigmatic smiles on his face.

"Funny, Tony."

Tony pouts, "Who was being funny? I was serious."

"Sure you were. Fine you don't have to go all puppy dog-eyed on me." Bruce kisses Tony's forehead then turns and heads to his bedroom. "Never a dull moment with you Tony."

Tony heads off to his own rooms, pleased with his minor victory, "The sooner you accept that the better for both of us, gamma boy," He thought.

Each movie night Tony did something different, insisting on walking Bruce back to his room, inviting Bruce out onto the terrace for a night cap, insisting on showing Bruce the latest upgrade to the Iron Man suit. At first Bruce thought it was just a friendly hanging out, but just as Bruce began to think it was something more, Tony stopped. In fact Tony stopped participating in movie night all together, making the excuse that he was working on a personal project and couldn't spare the time.

It's not that Bruce didn't enjoy the opportunity to be alone with Pepper; however, it did make things a lot more tempting. Bruce was realizing that the problem with considering the rage monster as more of a thinking being is that he couldn't as easily just write himself off as a monster. He had to accept that he was still human with emotions and desires, no matter how much he had tried to bury them. When he was on the road, on the run, it was just a parade of faces, never get close, never begin to feel anything but guilt and need to make good for all the wrong he and the monster created. Now he felt almost normal.

"Being normal would mean that you'd put your arm around the beautiful woman whose head is currently on your shoulder," he thought. It seemed Pepper had taken every opportunity to touch or be close to Bruce anytime they were alone. It was a pretty clear indication that reciprocal touch was okay, but Bruce was fighting with the thoughts in his head. He worried of jealousies, of losing one if not both of his friends, and then there was that part that of him that still believed he and the monster the same, guilty of so much, deserving of nothing.

Pepper could see Bruce's hand tense and relax, deciding whether to make a move or not. Pepper sighed; she was done with playing subtle. She reached forward, picked up the remote, and paused the movie.

"This is stupid Bruce; we are grown adults playing like teenagers."

"Playing like teenagers at what?"

"Oh god you are that clueless. I've done everything but strip naked to get your attention and you haven't made one move. Unless I've been reading you wrong, you are attracted to me?"

Bruce's mouth was suddenly dry, "Yes…very," he managed to croak out. "I just have to be careful. You know the other guy…"

"There's careful and not trying at all, Bruce. You are definitely working on the latter. Putting your arm around me isn't going to cause you to hulk out. I'm pretty sure one kiss wouldn't trigger him either."

"That's the problem Pepper, if I kiss you I'm not going to want to stop at one…"

"I wouldn't want you to."

"I probably wouldn't want to stop at kissing either."

Pepper leans in toward Bruce until he can feel her breath, warm against his skin, "I don't think that would be a problem either."

Bruce licks his lips, wanting so much to just pull her into his arms, "But it may get too intense… look, since the big guy came along I haven't really… I don't know if I can get all the way through without having to stop to control the other guy… I don't want to disappoint you."

"I'm a big girl Bruce, if you have to stop, I can finish things by myself, it's not a big deal. I want you, in whatever way I can…"

"Then you'd be okay with it?"

"Yes Bruce, I know anything with you won't be 'normal', but look at Tony, I don't seem to be attracted to normal."

Bruce cradles the side of Pepper's face with his hand, rubbing her cheek with his thumb, "You are so beautiful. Do you have any idea how incredibly beautiful you are?"

"Maybe," Pepper says placing a small kiss on Bruce's palm, "But why don't you show me?"

Bruce's t-shirt and Pepper's blouse are soon discarded to different ends of the couch. Bruce is still working at figuring out the combination to Pepper's bra but keeps getting distracted by the little moans she makes as he kisses along her neck. Neither hears Tony when he stumbles into the room.

Tony headed straight to the wet bar and sets out a bottle of bourbon, a glass, and then forgoing the glass takes a big swig directly from the bottle. His hair is in disarray and his face is cover with smudges of soot. The alcohol doesn't help the smoke in his throat and lungs and soon he's coughing very violently and loudly.

Bruce and Pepper both stop and turn immediately at the sound. "Holy Crap Tony," Bruce says disentangling himself from Pepper. He gets off the couch to go check on the slightly unsteady genius. "What happened?"

"Failure, that's what happened, final test and then whoosh," Tony says flailing his arms to demonstrate the disaster that happened in the lab. In the process he sloshes bourbon everywhere. "All that work, up in flames."

Pepper joins them grabbing the bottle from Tony and sitting it back on the counter. "Are you injured, do you need Bruce to look at something?"

"I'm fine, anything I want to show Banner, he's not ready to look at."

"Huh? What am I not ready to…?"

"Nevermind."

Pepper decides on a second opinion, "JARVIS?"

"He's not injured Ms. Potts; he was away from the project when it exploded. The fire has been contained with minimal damage although Dummy is offline."

"He caught the brunt of the blast," said Tony, reaching around Pepper to retrieve the bottle. "I'll fix him tomorrow. I'll be out on the terrace."

Pepper spins him around and points him towards the interior rooms. "Go get drunk in your suite. It's raining outside."

"Sure. Fine. Whatever." Tony wanders off to his rooms.

"I think we should go down to my place. He's going to want to talk and I'm not in the mood for drunken Tony. He can talk to JARVIS."

"Is he going to be okay?"

Pepper puts back on her blouse, "Yeah, he'll get drunk, sleep it off and be back to normal in the morning. It must have been a personal project. With contract projects he's not as emotionally invested." Pepper smiled and took Bruce's hand "Come on. I promise to have you back to your room before curfew."

They took the private elevator down to Pepper's floor just below the labs. Half the floor contained Pepper's apartment, the other was administrative offices. Exiting the elevator placed you in a foyer with a set of teak pocket doors that opened up into her apartment.

"Wow, this is really nice Pepper," Bruce said upon entering the living room. "I see now why you maintain a separate place from Tony, you have very different styles."

"Well, yes, it's part of the reason, although I think Tony would let me do whatever I wanted to with his floor as long as I don't touch the labs. But I like still having something that's my own. I know a lot of women wouldn't mind being completely pampered and such but I'm a little too independent for that. After Potts Tower is complete, maybe then I'll move upstairs permanently. Turn this into a guest suite or a retreat or something." Pepper put the DVD into the player and flopped on the couch patting it for Bruce to come join her.

"Am I going have to take that off of you again?" Bruce says eyeing her blouse.

Pepper nods, "And if you do a good enough job, I'll take the rest off myself."

Bruce didn't make it back up to his room until the next morning. It went like that for a couple of weeks. It was easier because Tony was being scarce. Despite assurances Bruce still didn't feel comfortable traipsing off with Pepper in front of Tony.

* * *

One night Pepper was busy so Bruce decided to try and drag Tony out of the lab and spend time with him. He missed talking to the fellow genius and wondered why he had pulled away from their friendship so sudden. But he was unable to get past the lab door. It was locked and JARVIS informed him that yet again Tony didn't want visitors since he was working on a personal project.

Having a night to himself, Bruce decided to relax and enjoy some TV. He flipped channels until he found a documentary discussing the similarities in ape and human aggression. When they started discussing aggression lowering techniques he started to frantically search for the remote that allowed him to pause the program like Tony had showed him.

"Are you in need of assistance?" JARVIS voice startled Bruce.

"Uh yeah, you wouldn't know which remote pauses programs?"

"The small light gray one, Bruce. You can also record the program from the beginning as well."

Bruce found the remote, paused the program, and then set it to record so he could look at it later if necessary. He then ran off to his room for his notebook. When he returns, he finds Tony once again disheveled, covered in dust this time and heading for the wet bar. Since Tony was still a bit dazed Bruce is able to quicken his pace and beat him to it.

"Can I get you something Tony?"

Tony attempts to get around Bruce to where the bottles are kept but doesn't have much luck. Bruce reaches behind him and produces one of the bottles showing it to Tony for approval. Tony shakes his head no. Bruce sits it on the counter and selects another bottle. After several rounds of picking the wrong one, Bruce finally selects a bottle Tony wants. Tony reaches out to grab the bottle but Bruce ignores him, finds a glass, and pours a reasonable amount into it handing it to Tony. "Go sit on the couch." Tony finishes the drink he's handed in one gulp and puts it back in front of Bruce. "I'll refill if you go sit on the couch." Tony sighs and complies. Bruce refills the glass and joins him.

"Now tell me what blew up this time." Tony reaches for the glass, which Bruce promptly moves out of his reach, "Talk first then drink."

"Fine, you are being a complete pain in the ass by the way. Nothing blew up this time, just the whole model structure collapsed. Apparently some chemical compounds refuse to work together under stress."

Bruce nods, "Personal project?"

"You could say that."

"What is it?"

"Personal. Can I have my drink now?"

"Sure, but maybe try and actually savor the taste this time." Tony took two pulls from the glass in order to finish it then went to get off the couch. Bruce gently, but forcibly, pushed Tony back down. "Where are you going?"

"To get the damn bottle, there is still way too much blood in my alcohol stream."

"Hey, here's a concept, why don't we discuss what went wrong with your project and see if we can come up with a solution instead of drinking ourselves, well yourself, into a stupor."

"I said the project's personal."

"Okay fine," Bruce takes the glass from Tony and sits it down on the table. "Then what do you want to talk about?"

"I want to talk about another drink or more appropriately the whole damn bottle. Don't you have work to do? Why don't you go bother Pepper?"

"I was taking a break from work, believe it or not there is such a thing as too much time in the lab. And Pepper is at a meeting for the Stark Industries Environmental Expo that's happening next month, remember? But even if she weren't I'd still be right here."

"Why? You two have a fight or something? Because lately you two seemed to be joined at the hip. Sickeningly adorable if you ask me."

"Not that anyone was. But I haven't gotten to hang out with you in a while. You are either in lab or in your rooms. If I didn't know better I would think you were trying to avoid me."

"So you want to hang out. What should we do paint our nails, gossip about boys, make prank calls…?"

"You're being an ass Tony… which usually means you're either nervous or worried."

"It's nothing."

"And you don't want to talk about it. Fine, how about we watch TV instead? Have you ever seen Mythbusters? Great show, experiments, robots and they blow up stuff too." Bruce gets up from the couch. "I'm going to heat up some pizza from last night, you want some?"

"Does it come with alcohol?"

Bruce chuckles, "No, it comes with soda, water, milk, or juice."

Tony gives Bruce a dramatic sigh, "I guess I'll have some. With a side of bottle water my good man."

"As you wish," Bruce does a mock bow then heads into the kitchen.

Tony watches him the whole way, feeling his pulse begin to elevate. "And that's with a t-shirt and sweats," Tony thought to himself. "If he ever starts wearing tight clothing I'm done for." Tony turned back toward to TV with a sigh. He picked up the remote clicked through the channels preparing for spending an evening with Bruce; the one man he's fallen for, yet can't seem to let him know.

It turned out to be a Mythbuster's marathon. Through the first episode Tony was still complaining about wanting a drink but did take time to notice that the red-headed woman was attractive. Bruce and Tony were starting to keep score of who was right about it being a myth or not somewhere between episodes two and three. By the fourth episode Tony was coming up with ideas of how to make the myths actually work. By episode six however, the effects of being up almost 40 hours takes its toll and Tony's snoring, despite the explosion on television.

"Tony, Tony," Bruce gently shakes him. "Maybe you should go to bed."

Tony half opened his eyes, "Will you go too?"

"Yes, it's been a long day."

"Good, I don't want to sleep alone."

"Oh, that's not what I meant…I was going to bed also. Not going to sleep in your bed."

"Why not, there's plenty of room, unless of course you don't want a lot of room…"

"I, I can't…" Bruce looked at Tony and swore that the billionaire playboy looked hurt. "Maybe another time."

"Yeah, sure." Tony pushed himself off the couch and headed to his bedroom. "You know there is a lot of people who would pay a lot of money to share my bed."

Bruce picked up the glasses and plates and took them into kitchen. "But they aren't afraid of hurting you," he said once Tony was out of earshot.

By the time he wakes up the next morning, it's almost noon and if he doesn't get into gear, Bruce is going to be late for his lunch date with Pepper. He doesn't really have time to check in on Tony so he asks JARVIS. "JARVIS, where is Tony?" He was still amazed how used to talking to the AI he had gotten.

"Mr. Stark is in his lab working on a personal project. He has barred access to his lab until two this afternoon."

"Is he okay JARVIS?"

"All his vitals are normal."

"Will you let him know I've gone out to lunch with Pepper? I should be back in about an hour."

"I'll inform Mr. Stark, enjoy your date."

Sometimes the JARVIS' humanness disturbed Bruce, but he still smiled at the word date. Turns out he didn't make it back when he thought he would. Pepper had a last minute meeting. Then where she wanted to go for lunch was across town, she thought Bruce needed to get away from the Tower more often. He had to admit the food was good and really he wasn't on a schedule. He had work, of course, but the type of things he did really didn't have timetables that included hours, more like weeks and months. But still he was a little worried about Tony.

"Tony's personal project blew up again last night."

"Oh goodness, you should've came down and slept with me. How drunk was he?"

"Not at all, I restricted him to a couple of drinks, from a glass, and then got him to watch a Mythbuster's marathon. He finally got tired so I made him go to bed."

"Wow. You are such a good influence on him," Pepper said, patting his shoulder.

"I guess."

"I know that tone, Bruce, what's up?"

"Well I think I hurt his feelings last night."

"Well you did deny him his stupor."

"It wasn't that…He wanted me to go to bed with him. He said he was lonely. And I, like a jerk, told him maybe later. He's been so nice to me; given me so much and I couldn't simply lie in bed with him so he could feel less lonely…"

"I'm not sure he was thinking just laying there Bruce. You do realize he's attracted to you?"

"No, he's not Pepper…"

"Jesus Bruce, were you this clueless before the other guy came along, or is it that you believe that no one would want you?"

Bruce sighs, "I guess it's the latter. But what am I going to do about Tony? I don't want to hurt him; he's my friend, employer, team member…"

"How do you feel about him?"

"I'm not attracted to men, Pepper."

"That wasn't the question. The one thing Tony has taught me is things are more fluid than one thinks, schedules, plans, rules, sexuality. I mean I'm not attracted to women, however there is this one that given the opportunity…"

"Anyone I know?" Bruce smiles, because he's sure of what woman she's talking about.

"We were talking about you and Tony. So are you attracted to him?"

"I, I don't know. And because I don't know I don't want to give him the wrong idea and have to take it back later. I don't want things to be awkward between us. I try to think it out, take this clusterfuck of feelings I have and puzzle out what's true and what's just fear of losing a friend. Then it gets all too confusing and the other guy starts to stir and I push it all back in a box. It was like that with my feelings for you too. But once I knew how you felt it was easier, I've been with women before; I know I'm attracted to them and I know what to do with them… With Tony I wouldn't have a clue."

"You know there is this thing called the internet? You could look it up."

Bruce chuckles, "I have. Not helping things one bit."

"Well I'm sure you don't have to do all of them. Hell, have you seen some of the straight stuff out there. Not interested in a lot of it."

Bruce arches an eyebrow at Pepper then leans in closely and whispers, "So what parts are you interested in?"

"Maybe I'll just email you some links."

Getting back to his room he finds a post-it note on his door. "My lab." Bruce thought maybe he'd finally get a glimpse of this personal project that had turned Tony into a hermit. He headed down to Tony's lab to find the door open and walked in to find no Tony. There was, however a flat wrapped package on a table in the center of the room. On top of it was a smaller package, both tied with shiny ribbons like a present. There was a note on top of the smaller package. "Remember I started this before we talked in Texas. This is for my business partner, my team mate and friend, not the other guy. P.S. Open the big one first."

Bruce carefully opens the big package first, excited but at the same time trying to remain calm, since it seemed from the note it may upset him. Inside is a desk blotter. Bruce is confused at first but then notices the sketches. At first he thinks it's a cell, but then he sees the writing across the top, "Hulk's workout and rumpus room." He chuckles at the name and some of the tension goes away. But as he continues to look over the plans he has to remind himself several times what the note said, this is a gift, this is for him, and it's not really about the other guy. He begins to think about how much this would cost to be built and he has to calm his pulse down again. Why would anyone want to spend this much on him without an agenda?

He just let that question hang out in the back of his mind while he opened the second package. It was a framed drawing of a room, with a fountain in the center, a simple bed in the corner. A combination of cushions and couches surrounded the rest of the room, with a writing desk against one wall. All were in various shades of purple and deep blues with backgrounds in neutral and white tones. It's easy to understand that it's a luxury bedroom of some kind, but what it had to do with him, he couldn't begin to accept. He is disturbed out of his thoughts by a sudden arm around his shoulders.

"I don't know if this is something you would like, I guessed. If it's not we can start the design all over again. I just want you to have a place where you can go when you need to be calm, when you need to be alone. I think it's a much better option than hitchhiking… you aren't mad are you?"

"Tony," Bruce looks down at the drawing again, along with technical drawing of the Hulk room, "They're great and probably astronomically expensive…"

"You do realize I'm a billionaire right?"

"Of course Tony, that's not the point…the point is why?"

"Didn't I just tell you why? Oh, you are looking for the agenda underneath again. Well, Dr. Banner, I guess we'll have to go over this again. Remember me, selfish, don't want you go away? I mean we can go to Nevada again if necessary but I figured a more immediate and closer facility would also be nice. That way if you need to let the big guy out for any reason, you have a safe place to do so. There will be cameras in there, but that's for your safety, if anything happens. Someone will be monitoring but not recording. I promise. Unless that's something you want. Oh and there has been a side benefit to all of this. I've created a couple of metal combinations that are practically indestructible, that can be used to house the arc reactors in power plants, so a whole city's power isn't knocked out due to storm or alien invasion."

"So this was the personal project you've been working on?"

"Yes, and as you see, very personal."

Remembering what Pepper had said earlier, Bruce says, "You know you can't buy my affection Tony."

Tony swiftly removes his arm from around Bruce's shoulder. "Buy your affection? I don't buy affection Bruce. Accolades, maybe, attention, definitely, but if my good looks and charm isn't enough for someone to shower me with affection then any amount of money is just going to buy me a poor facsimile. Spent enough time doing that in my youth, I am never going to do that again. No Dr. Banner, there are no more agendas than the ones I've already told you. Maybe you should think about what your agendas are." Tony turns and walks out of the lab.

"Tony that's not what I meant." Bruce wants to go after Tony but figures if he catches up to him all they will end up doing is arguing and he doesn't want to risk having to fight the other guy for control. So he takes the drawings and goes to his bedroom locking himself in and away from Tony.

A few hours later there is a knock at his door. "Bruce, it's Pepper. It has been a hellish day and I need to unwind. Come watch a movie with me."

"I'm probably not the best company right now."

"Please," Pepper said, hitting all those tones of innocence that makes you feel like an ass for refusing the request.

Bruce sighed, got up from his bed, and opened the door, "Okay, okay, but don't say I didn't warn you."

When they got to the living room, Tony was already sitting on the couch. Bruce turned to head back to his room but Pepper grabbed his arm and practically dragged him into the room and deposited him on the couch. She then sat between them and turned on the movie. Pepper would give a reassuring touch to one or the other man but no one said anything. Halfway through the movie, Pepper reached for the remote, turned off the TV and got up from the couch.

"Whatever is going on between you too, work it out. I can't breathe in all this tension. I'll call in the morning."

When Bruce hears the elevator doors close he turns to Tony. "Look, I'm sorry…" Tony gives him a look. "Forget your rule; I really need to apologize this time. I was an ass. I let my insecurities and doubts ruin what was a really, really great gift. I still have trouble trusting, I'm working on it, but unlike science I seem to be a slow learner."

Tony gets up from the couch. "Would you like to have a beer and join me on the terrace?"

It was a nice night to be outside. Cool but not too cold and a clear sky. "Great view isn't it?" Tony said while walking along the perimeter of the terrace. "I used to think this was the absolute best thing in the world. Having great big building with my name on it, overlooking, well looking down on everyone else, towering over everyone with my greatness. Sometimes I wonder if not for this," he taps the arc reactor, "I could have ended up much like Loki without all the magic." He completed his circuit and walked back to Bruce. "You know what the scariest part of being kidnapped was? That if I died out there no one would care. I mean people would care about the loss of business, of money, of intelligence, but I didn't think one person would miss Tony Stark, the man. Now I know differently. Pepper cares about me so much. I don't think I'll ever understand why. But I know no matter how many times I screw up she will care, and even if I screw up so much that she needs to walk away again, she still cares. It's obvious how you feel about Pepper; you are in her apartment more than you are up here. But I have no idea how you feel about me. I'm not getting a yes or a no, just neutral static. At this point I almost don't care; I just want an answer so we can move on."

"You're my friend Tony, always. I would miss you terribly if you weren't in my life, even if I don't seem to act like I do. It's the other part that I don't know about. It's hard for me to deal with and I try not to think about it too much. But sometimes it seems it is all I think about. I'm confused and I don't want to start something that I change my mind about midstream and then hurt you…"

"I may not act like it sometimes but I am an adult Bruce, I can handle rejection. I may not like it but I'm not going to break if you reject me, now or in the future. I just don't understand why you are confused, you seem pretty sure about you and Pepper."

"That's because I'm not attracted to men. Yeah, I know that should make it the end of the discussion. But dammit Tony, you are a man but then you are so much more than just an ordinary man." Tony smiled at that and Bruce couldn't help but smile back. "That's not helping by the way. I just don't know. I can't separate what's friendship, what's admiration, what's maybe more. And until I figure that out, I just don't feel its right to drag you along for the ride."

Tony closed the distance between them, putting his hands in Bruce's hair and pulling him into a kiss, pressing his lips hard against the bewildered man. Bruce is in shock and doesn't move for a few seconds, then frantically pushes Tony away.

"What the fuck Tony?"

"Tired of theory and hypothesis wanted to move to experimentation. Did you enjoy it?"

"Hell no, you practically attacked me, of course I didn't enjoy it."

"Because it was sudden or because it was me?"

"Because…well I don't know…It was so sudden, I couldn't process anything except someone was in my personal space."

"Could we try again? It'll be scientific. I will kiss you, you will take notice of any sensations or emotions you feel while I'm kissing you and then you can tell me how it felt afterward."

"I'm not sure this is a good idea."

"Afraid you might like it?"

Bruce sighs, "Fine okay, proceed with your experiment."

"Okay Bruce," Tony's voice dips down a half octave, "I'm going to kiss you now. I'll behave and keep my hands and tongue to myself, but if at any time you want more, just let me know. I'll be more than happy to ramp things up." Bruce rolled his eyes at Tony. Tony once again stepped into Bruce's personal space, but this time waiting until Bruce had gotten used to him being there and relaxed. Tony started to lean forward to kiss Bruce but he stopped and took a step back away from Bruce.

"I think you should know first why I want to kiss you, my agenda. I'm a great admirer of your work and the amount of strength you must have to control the force inside of you. I also think you are funny, a genius, and have the most wonderful laugh. But above all that there are times I think you look so fucking good that it takes everything in me not to grab and drag you to my room. I really, really, hope you feel even a fraction of desire for me that I have for you. If you feel nothing, that's okay too, I still want you to be my friend, because...because friends are really hard to come by, and more than anything I need you to be my friend."

Only then did Tony step forward and press his lips to Bruce's. They were soft, yet slightly chapped and he felt that if he stuck his tongue out the tiniest bit he could taste the beer that Bruce had been drinking. But he promised to be good and Tony thinks he deserves a medal for the amount of restraint he was exhibiting. He feels Bruce take in a deep breath. It's mostly through his nose but also through his mouth causing Bruce's lips to move against his. The movement created a tingle that ran from his lips down to the pit of his belly. Tony clenched his hands into fists to keep them from moving to where he so desperately wanted them to go. Bruce steps back and takes a shuttering breath.

"Experiment is over Tony."

"And?"

"I'm not sure."

"What do you mean you're not sure?"

"I can't put it into words," Bruce says as he grips the bottle tighter in his hand as he face feels suddenly flush and he can't quite look at Tony directly, "It's probably nothing."

"Shall we try again?"

"I think we should let it go for now," Bruce says turning away from Tony while taking a rather large gulp of his beer.

"You felt something didn't you? You enjoyed it and you just don't want to admit it."

"Tony…" Bruce warns.

Tony smiled as he put his hands up, surrendering, "Okay, letting it go."

Bruce finishes off his beer in one last long draw. "It's been a long day, I think I'm going to take a shower and head to bed. Good night Tony."

As Bruce heads back inside, Tony yells to him, "Is that going to be a hot shower or a cold shower?"

Bruce sighed and decided Tony deserved the truth, "Cold shower, a very cold shower."

"So are we on for more 'experimenting' tomorrow night?" Tony attempts his usual flippant tone but he's holding his breath at the end.

The response came out just above a whisper, to say it louder would mean having to admit how he felt, how he too had to force his hands to remain still. "Yes Tony." Bruce quickly heads back inside and to his room before changing his mind.

Tony lies back on one of the loungers with a salacious smirk on his face. For the rest of the night he considers all the experiments he has in mind for Dr. Banner, the man, not the monster.


	11. Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I plan on touching you a lot."

Bruce kissed Tony all night. They experimented with many different types of kisses; a quick peck on the cheek, a tender kiss on the lips, hot, passionate, kisses where he thought he'd run out of air. Mostly Tony was the aggressor but this time Bruce had Tony pushed against the wall, one hand gripped tightly in the playboy's hair, the other at the base of his spine pulling him closer, if it were possible. It was a desperate kiss, open mouthed with Bruce's tongue probing insistently into Tony's eager mouth. Tony hums as he runs his hands under Bruce's shirt and lightly scratches down his back. Bruce releases from the kiss with a moan and suddenly realizes he's awake and he had been dreaming. Bruce finds himself slightly out of breath and his hand in an embarrassing place if anyone were around. Even more embarrassing since it's only partially covering the hardness brought on by the dream.

Bruce decides against going back to sleep and after a quick shower heads to the lab to work. After working on some easier projects he moves on to more detailed projects because his dreams are still invading his thoughts. He was in the process of mixing chemicals together when suddenly there was a hand on his back. He tensed his back very tightly to keep his hands from jumping.

"It's just me Bruce," Tony said.

"Volatile chemicals here."

Tony began to rub Bruce's back, "And you are very tense."

"Tony stop. I need to focus, as I said before volatile chemicals." Tony reluctantly removed his hand and stepped back. Bruce finished mixing the chemicals, placed the flask on a burner and set a timer for how long it was supposed to heat. The moment Bruce finished his task Tony's hand returned to rubbing circles against his back. "Tony…"

"I've decided to start today's experiment early. I think I jumped the gun going straight to kissing, no matter how much I think you secretly enjoyed it. I thought we would go with something much more basic. Touch. Being alone all the time you haven't gotten nearly enough of it…"

"And this is going to prove what?"

"Well, l think that after you had enough touch you will be able to tell which is neutral, comforting, annoying or," Tony lightly trails his fingers down Bruce's spine causing him to shiver, "Which is sexual. You'll also know what kind you want to receive and from whom."

"And I'm supposed to figure this all out in a day."

"No, I figure a week should be sufficient." Tony smiled, "I plan on touching you a lot."

And touch Tony did, every moment he could. Be it a pat on the shoulder, trailing fingers across Bruce's hand as he reached for something, a ruffling of Bruce's hair when they talked; Tony's hands seemed to be everywhere. By the end of the day, while having a beer on the terrace, Bruce felt the need to institute some rules for the experiment.

"First," Bruce said taking a step away from Tony so he could hope to finish the sentence without being touched. "First, no touching while I'm handling anything breakable or dangerous. Second, no sneak attack touches, I'd like not to have to wrestle with the other guy. Third, no groping, palming or anything that would be considered a sexual touch…"

Tony huffed at Bruce, "I have done no such thing."

"Just being preemptive Tony."

"How am I supposed to know what you consider sexual? Maybe you got some weird erogenous zones and then I get blamed for doing something completely innocent."

"Um, well, ok how about no obvious sexual touching?"

"Fair enough. Now I have some rules for you, gamma boy."

"Oh? How are you going to have rules…"

"One, for the duration of this experiment, Pepper is held to the same rules. If I can't feel you up neither can she. And two, you have to touch back. Touch is a two way street, give and receive…. Oh and two point one, you can and must touch Pepper in front of me. I don't know why you feel the need to hide your relationship with her. I'm well aware of it, besides I wasn't that dazed the other night; I saw what you two were up to. I'm fine with it, if I wasn't you certainly would've known by now."

"I know you are okay with it, just didn't want to flaunt it in your face."

"Why not, why wouldn't I want to see my two favorite people happy? I certainly don't think I've been that chaste with Pepper in front of you."

"You're odd Tony."

"Is that news, Bruce? But in this instance I don't think I am. The world is. But whatever, you're not flaunting and I like to see you happy, end of story."

That night Bruce had a hard time falling asleep. He felt everything, the sheet, the pillowcase, the carpeting he paced back and forth on barefoot when he couldn't sleep. He wanted to go wake Tony up just to make him suffer like he was. But in the end he just stripped his bed and lay on the mattress which didn't seem to aggravate him as much. These feelings will go away once I get used to it, he thought. At least he hoped it was the case. Once he could find a way to lay perfectly still he finally fell asleep.

Tony followed Bruce's rules the next day. This relaxed Bruce enough, that by afternoon he had touched Tony a couple of times as well. They were awkward touches but Tony always gave a reassuring smile of approval and never laughed.

The next evening all three of them went out to dinner. Surely, Bruce thought, there wouldn't be any touching in public. He was wrong and it made him really tense. It was all so subtle and innocent from both Tony and Pepper, a small touch when passing the wine, when handing over a fork full of something new to try, when telling a joke, Bruce was aware of every excruciating moment.

"What's up Bruce? You look a little green around the gills," Tony inquired. "Not ragey green, more puke or bolt green."

"Didn't realize it was so obvious, it's the touching…in public…feel like everyone is looking."

"And? Are you embarrassed of Pepper…or is it me?" Bruce couldn't meet Tony's eyes "So it is me. Fine. I can accept that."

"It's not fine, and it's not you, well not all you. It's different when we are all in Stark Tower. I don't feel judged. But out here, I'm just more conscious."

"Self-conscious."

"Yes, Tony self-conscious. I mean everyone knows that you and Pepper are an item what does it look like if I'm touching her."

"But we've gone out before Bruce, just you and me," Pepper interjects.

"But always a meal and I never touched you. If anyone saw us they would assume it's just business."

"Oh, I never realized."

"And Tony…"

"You don't want people to think you are gay I get it…"

"I don't want to hurt your reputation."

Tony barks out a laugh, "That's such bullshit. There is nothing you could do to hurt my reputation; I do a damn good job of that myself. And you know what, as long as I'm no longer the merchant of death, I don't fucking care. This insecurity, embarrassment, whatever you want to call it, it's all on you. Pepper and I don't have a damn thing to do with it."

Bruce bows his head down, aimlessly moving his food around his plate not sure what to say. Pepper removes the fork from his hand putting her hands around his hand, Tony does the same to his other hand. "Look up Bruce," Pepper says.

"Yeah, lift your head up Brucey and take a nice long look around the room," Tony adds, "Is anyone looking?"

Bruce looked around the restaurant. He met a couple pair of eyes, but they weren't really looking at him, he was just caught in their scan around the room. "Not really."

"And even if they were, it wouldn't matter. Pepper is not ashamed of you and I'm not ashamed of you. You shouldn't be ashamed because I think that's what this is all about. You don't think you deserve to be cared about, to be touched. You base all who you are on the other guy. And even he deserves to be cared about. He's a fucking hero and so are you. And even if you weren't, you still deserve to be cared about and touched. Get it?"

"I'm trying to Tony."

Pepper pats his hand, "Well that's a start."

When they get back to the tower, Pepper heads to her apartment stating that she has a meeting early in the morning. "Hey Bruce, drink, terrace?" Tony asked after Pepper left.

"I think I'm going to pass Tony. I got a lot to think about and I don't think I'd be good company right now. Alcohol will only cloud my thoughts." Bruce steps forward and gives Tony a hug. "Good night, Tony thanks for dinner.” Bruce heads off to his room while Tony just stands there in stunned silence.

After a couple glasses of scotch, Tony decides to head down to his lab because as usual he was having a hard time winding down. About two in the morning he finally felt tired and headed to his room. Tony had just dozed off when JARVIS announced a call from Nick Fury.

"This had better be good Fury…"

"You and Banner have thirty minutes to get to S.H.I.E.L.D.'s administrative building; a helicopter will bring you to the helicarrier."

"And why do I need to do this instead of sleeping?"

"I thought you were on board but I should've known better…"

"Yeah, yeah I'm on board. Sheesh, a please or a sorry to bother you at o dark thirty…"

"O dark thirty is still a couple hours away and now if you could please get you and Banner's collective asses to the helicopter in 25 minutes so we can stop an invasion that would be perfect."

"Sarcasm doesn't sound good from you Fury. Okay we'll be there." Tony threw on some clothes and headed down the hall to Bruce's room. He knocked on the door gently not wanting to startle Bruce if he had already fallen asleep. Bruce opened the door after a few seconds, already dressed in a t-shirt and sweats and a pensive look on his face.

"JARVIS was kind enough to warn me. I'm ready," Bruce says with a yawn.

"I'm not but I guess we are going anyway. Why can't invasions happen at a decent hour of the day?"

"Why can they just not happen at all?"

"Good point."

As they went down the elevator to Tony's private garage, Tony put his arm around Bruce. "Don't worry; we'll all keep an eye on the other guy. He listens to Capsicle and you know how much of a mother hen he is."

Bruce chuckled at that image, then realized the fact he could laugh before a mission was nothing short of a miracle. He reached up and rubbed Tony's hand. "Thanks."

During the ride to S.H.I.E.L.D. administrative headquarters and the subsequent ride to the helicarrier, Tony kept up an everything-but-the-mission banter with Bruce. Mostly he talked about minor projects, nothing that he cared if anyone heard about. However, every once in a while when no one was looking he would touch Bruce and ask him if he was okay.

They were the last ones to arrive to the briefing. "Stark, Banner, nice of you to join us," Fury said with his usual sarcasm. "Banner, you seem unusually calm…"

"Don't worry I'll be able to bring the other guy out when needed."

"Good. Okay let's get started, I've got tickets for the game tonight, I'd like to be able to use them."

What Fury told them made it seem like this was going to be a walk in the park. Their objective was to take out a terrorist cell with delusions of grandeur trying to invade the U.S. through an unguarded part of the Canadian border. The terrorists' target was a small town in North Dakota, where they would set up a base of operations and move forward. Fury stated the only reason that the military wasn't taking care of this is because people get a little uncomfortable about military force on American soil and that S.H.I.E.L.D. wasn't as monitored.

They were split up into teams. Banner was with Rogers because everyone knew the Hulk would listen to his orders. Stark was with Thor for the shock and awe factor. Romanoff and Barton were actually going to be in Canada infiltrating the cell's base of operations while it was mostly abandoned. Bruce walked with Tony to get the Iron Man suit. "Not looking forward to the quinjet ride are you?" Tony asked.

"Well its better with Rogers than Barton or Romanoff, but still he's not immortal." Tony stopped and turned. Facing Bruce he put his hands on his shoulders. "It'll be fine. Yeah I know what happened last time you were on the carrier but it's not going to happen this time. You're more in control and we don't have a half-crazed demigod pulling people's strings."

"Loki was full-on crazy Tony."

"Okay, point taken, just don't let Thor hear you say that. Now go. We'll go out for shawarma when this is all over."

"What is it with you and shawarma?"

* * *

Things started going downhill the moment they made it their rendezvous points.

"I got bad news," Natasha's voice crackled in all their ears.

"What is it Romanoff?" Fury responded.

"Whoever gave you the intel fucked up royally." Barton growled into his com.

"He's right. If we can believe the plans we found, troop number and weapons were greatly underestimated."

"By how much?" Rogers asked.

"At least twice as many troops. The weapons, it's not just the amount but also the quality. Apparently someone has been hoarding this stuff for years just for this occasion," Romanoff responds.

"Meaning?" Rogers replied.

"It's old Stark Industries tech. It seems like they picked up the whole catalog Tony." Romanoff replied half apologetically.

"Fuck me," Tony whispered over the com.

"I hope Banner had his Wheaties this morning," Barton interjected "Whole lot of heavy duty shit that needs to be smashed. We'll be there as soon as we can. Cap find me a highpoint, I think I'm going to be going through a lot of explosive arrows today."

Fury never made it to the game. It was touch and go for a while but the enemy only made it far enough on to American soil to be prosecuted under its laws. Everyone was at the very least bruised including Bruce who had reverted back while still about 10 feet off the ground; the battle had completely burned through other guy's energy. Everyone took air transportation back to S.H.I.E.L.D. for a mercifully short debriefing and then headed back to their respective places for much needed rest.

There wasn't much talk on the way home; both of them were just that tired. It was only when Tony went to shift the car gears that he realized that Bruce's hand is on his thigh. He gives it a quick, reassuring, but tired pat, shift gears and continues back to the tower. Getting off the elevator, they drift off to their separate rooms without a word.

For hours Tony attempted sleep but was kept tossing and turning by the events of the day. He was irritated; it had been a long day and an exhausting battle. The fact that most of the enemy's weapons were old Stark tech was just the icing on the craptacular cake. He contemplated going to his lab and work but decided against that. As tired and distracted as he felt, he was sure something would end up exploding and he hurt too much already. Just as Tony finally starts to drift off, there is a knock at his door. He was about to tell Pepper, because who else could it be, to go away when he heard the tired pitiful voice from the other side of the door.

"Tony, um, it's Bruce, I can't sleep, do you mind if I come in?"

Tony couldn't be mad at something that sounded so pathetic. He climbed out of bed and padded across the room and opened the door. There stood Bruce, dirty, disheveled, and still wearing the borrowed clothes from earlier. Tony made a mental note to talk to Fury with about making sure there was always a change of clothing available for Bruce, which actually fit, on all missions. The least they could do to repay him for his work is keep something in his size in storage. He realized he had drifted off in thought and Bruce was still waiting patiently, albeit barely standing up, waiting for Tony to say something.

"Of course, come in." Tony says, stepping out of the way and going back to sit on the bed. Bruce closes the door and follows but stops and stands, shoulders slumped, at the edge of the bed. Tony pats the bed for Bruce to join him.

"I'm filthy; I wouldn't want to mess up your bed."

Tony points to the bathroom, "Then go take a shower you filthy little monkey. Then we can talk about what's got you still up after what has got to be the most tiring mission since the Chitauri." Bruce hesitates then turns toward the bedroom door, "I'll go get a change of clothes from your room. You just go take that shower. I can smell you from here."

Bruce does as he told and Tony heads to Bruce's room and returns several minutes later with something he thinks Bruce would sleep comfortably in. He places the items beside him on the bed because he doesn't want to startle Bruce by taking them into the bathroom. He could see how tense Bruce was and he didn't want to risk a second hulking out in less than 24 hours. Tony dozed off while waiting but snapped awake when he heard the click of the bathroom door opening. By the time his eyes adjusted there was Bruce, damp with a towel around his waist and another towel drying his hair.

"Decided to keep my clothes out here so you could see me naked?"

Tony shook his head, "I wish I was awake enough to be that devious. No, just didn't want to startle you by bringing them in there." Tony takes a moment to look over Bruce from head to toe, giving an appreciative nod now and then. Then he gives Bruce the most salacious smile his exhausted body can muster, "I think this is my reward for being thoughtful." He takes his hand and rubs it along Bruce's chest. Bruce is startled and tenses up at first but then begins to relax to the touch. "I never realized what a hairy little monkey you are."

"Tony you've seen me naked before…"

"But I'm usually too worried about whether or not you are okay to appreciate the scenery. And I haven't seen you completely naked; thanks to really those resilient pants you seem to wear. However," Tony stares poignantly at the towel, "If you would like to change that, I assure you I would be most appreciative."

Bruce stammers as he grabs his clothes, heading to the bathroom, "I should probably get dressed." Bruce returns in a few minutes and joins Tony on the bed.

"The other guy keeping you up?"

Bruce nods, "He's pacing the walls it seems. Battle still seems to have him all revved up. If I can't relax it just makes it so much harder to keep him caged."

Tony touches Bruce's face, turning it toward him, "Well your eyes and skin are still the right color, so you are doing something right."

"I guess, just feel like I'm holding on by a thread here."

Tony puts his hand on Bruce's thigh giving it a reassuring pat, "Anything I can do to help?"

Bruce looks away, "I was wondering if I could sleep in here tonight?"

"Pepper's apartment too far away?"

"It's not that. It's just nice having someone who knows and can understand what went on out there… and besides if the big guy shows up, you always have the suit to protect you. Actually this is probably a bad idea, you won't be able to get it in time, maybe I should go to SH…"

Tony puts his arm around Bruce, holding him in place, "You are not going anywhere. You just need some relaxing sleep and what better place than here. Big comfortable bed, moderate temperature, calming music, JARVIS something classical and soothing please, and a sleeping companion complete with night light who promises to be on their best behavior." Tony stands up and pulls the covers back. "Now get in, it's been way to long a day and I'm actually looking forward to sleep."

Bruce climbs in and turns to face away from Tony who has moved and gotten in the bed from the other side. Part of him is still embarrassed that he needed to ask, but he also knows he can't calm himself down right now and keeping the other guy in is more important than anything. Besides over the past few days he's gotten so used to touch that he craves it now. He wonders if he can make himself ask Tony to touch him again.

It seems Tony was able to read his mind as he suddenly feels fingers against his back. Small trailing touches at first then small circles over his shoulder blades and down his spine. It's sort of relaxing but the material of his shirt is irritating him, putting him on edge. He is a lot more wound up then he thought. Bruce sits up and takes off his shirt. "It was bunching up," he tells Tony as he lies back down. Tony's immediately returns to rubbing his back.

"So you enjoy me touching you?"

"Yes," Bruce breathes out, relaxing against Tony's warm touch.

"Better than Pepper?"

Bruce turn's toward Tony, "I thought this wasn't a competition?"

"It's not, strictly a scientific question."

"I seriously doubt that. But to answer your question, it's not better or worse, just different."

"But enjoyable."

"Yes, Tony very enjoyable and…" Bruce's mind drifts back to earlier and a tremble goes through him.

"Bruce? Are you ok?"

Bruce turns back away from Tony, "I couldn't sleep; I turned on the TV, trying to relax… I saw the footage…"

Tony gives Bruce's shoulder a reassuring squeeze, "That wasn't all Hulk damage Bruce. It wasn't even mostly him. Stark Industries' battle weapons are very destructive. Apparently there is a downside to genius."

"Not your fault. You don't make them anymore and you certainly wouldn't have sold them to that group."

"You don't really know the old me," Tony sighed, "I just convinced myself when I was done it was over, but they are still out there…Bruce?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I hold you?"

Bruce lets out a breath, "Please."

Tony scooted closer and put an arm around Bruce's waist and nestling his head against the top of Bruce's back. Bruce found the coolness of the arc reactor's metal ring against his skin soothing and the weight of the arm around his waist grounded him.

"Safe." Bruce says as he puts a hand on top of Tony's.

"What?"

"Touch. Pepper's touch makes me feel cared about, maybe even loved. Your touch…" Bruce yawns, "Your touch makes me feel safe. Probably funny coming from a guy with a monster inside…" The last words drift out with another yawn and a few moments later, Bruce is asleep.

Tony focuses on the steady rise and fall of Bruce's stomach and then tension of the battle finally starts to leave him. He thinks that it's probably safe to end the experiment early. He doesn't know how Bruce feels about him but definitely knows he trusts him a lot more. He also realizes how much it's going to hurt if after all of this Bruce rejects him in the end. As much as Tony tried to make this all about seduce and conquer, he knows his heart has definitely become involved. Higher stakes hopefully higher payoff he thinks. Tony sighs, places a small kiss on the back of Bruce's neck, closes his eyes and falls asleep.

When Tony awoke the next morning he was laying on his back and alone in bed. He turned over in the direction of the bathroom hoping to hear movement inside but all was silent except for the classical music he had JARVIS put on the night before.

"You can turn that crap off now. I want Rammstein, just play it until I tell you differently." Tony yanks open drawers and slams through his closet depositing clothes on the bed before stomping off to take a shower. Twenty minutes in a steamy shower has done nothing to improve Tony's mood as he storms back into his bedroom to retrieve his clothes, Du Hast blaring over the speakers. "JARVIS, where's Banner?"

"Outside your door." Tony looks up at the door just in time to see it swing open. Bruce leans down to retrieve the tray he had sat on the floor.

"Oh you already up I see," Bruce sets the tray on the nightstand and hands Tony a cup of coffee. "I figured you would need your favorite food groups, sugar and caffeine. There are more donuts in the kitchen."

"Thanks," Tony said a little guiltily. He has JARVIS lower the music as he quickly downs a donut and finishes off the coffee. "I should probably get dressed." Tony reaches to pick up his clothing when he is stopped by Bruce's hand.

"Tony, I need to tell you something. I would like to do it now before I change my mind." A brief look of horror crosses Tony's face before he schools it back to neutral.

"Leaving again?"

"No Tony, I'm not leaving."

Tony lets out a breath, "Well that's good. So, gamma boy, what's up?"

Bruce licks his lips and looks at Tony but then glances away. It was like he was seeing Tony in a whole new light. His slightly messy hair, the earnest look of his eyes when he was truly listening, and those lips, it was hard for Bruce not to skip the speech and just devour him. So he looked down, Tony's smooth chest even marred by the arc reactor was still too tempting. He didn't dare to look down further but instead folded his hands and his lap and stared at them. "I've been so stupid." Bruce said with a huff. "I've been looking at everything as black and white, either or, one or the other. I'm a scientist for fuck's sake. I know there are variants, variables, exceptions, whatever you want call them. I just kept ignoring them, causing everyone grief in the process."

"I'm not quite following…"

"I want you Tony. I want to be with you."

Bruce didn't see the open mouthed stare Tony had on his face for a solid minute. Tony took one of Bruce's hands into his, "It's kind of hard to believe that when you won't look at me."

"I can't."

"Why? I don't want you to say this because you feel you somehow owe me or some stupid shit like that. I don't need pity love."

"It's not that at all Tony. Believe me; I've thought about this a lot. It's not obligation or pity; it's not fear of you wanting me to leave. Once I stopped telling myself that I couldn't possibly feel this way I realized how much I really wanted to be close to you. Not like a friend, not like a team mate, I wanted you as much if not more than I want Pepper. Pepper makes me feel good, don't get me wrong, and I love any time I spend with her, and she's incredibly sexy."

"So am I."

Bruce chuckled. Then he timidly reached out touched Tony's stomach, whose muscles twitched a little, causing Bruce to take a shuddering breath and pull his hand back. "Yes, you are Tony. But it's not just that. When I'm around you things just seem better, you somehow make me feel comfortable, calm, so…" the word just died on his tongue.

"Safe."

Bruce sighed, "Yes. Incredibly unromantic I know."

Tony puts his hand under Bruce's chin and lifts it up. "Between experiments and saving the world we live incredibly dangerous lives. Safe is incredibly romantic. And the fact that anyone feels safe around me is downright sexy." Bruce turned away. "Now why can't you look at me?"

"Cause I want to kiss you so badly. Touch you, hold you, I just want to explore every part that makes you Tony. But my heart is already beating so fast just getting up the nerve to say all this and my control…"

Tony puts a single finger up to Bruce's lips. "Lie back gamma boy. JARVIS play something relaxing please." Bruce lays down and Tony lays beside him, head on his shoulder, holding his wrist with his hand counting the beats of his heart. Bruce closes his eyes and focuses on the music and how safe he feels. When his pulse has calmed down greatly, Tony lifts to head to find Bruce staring at him and then leaning forward to kiss him. It raises Bruce's pulse, but not enough to worry about. Next they proceed to touch.


End file.
